At a certain stage in life, a person asks the question: . This happens when growing up, becoming a personality, turning points in life.

The question of self-esteem arises before a person who has not found himself, is in a state of search for fundamental ideas about himself.

A very related and burning question about self-love. Our methods of education carry elements of submission from an early age. When a person goes through the stage of growing up, the need to make independent decisions, to develop their own judgments, confuses many. They just aren't used to doing it.

The other side of the coin is the position of protest. Not knowing what is right, but wanting to be free, a person begins to deny any norms of behavior imposed on him, even correct ones.

How to learn to respect yourself

In order to learn to respect yourself, you need to allocate enough time for introspection, to determine, first of all, your own strengths and weaknesses. Learn to observe yourself from the outside, write down on a piece of paper all your pros and cons. You can do this for a week or even a month. When the list is finally ready, sum up: how many pluses, how many minuses.

Treat yourself as a respected person: will you begin to respect someone who walks in dirty shoes, sleeps without taking off his trousers and forgets to even wash his face in the morning? Will such a person have a mess in the apartment, crumpled things and an unshaven face? Tidy up everything around you.

• Understand your surroundings: what kind of people you communicate with. Are they worthy of respect? If the social circle is pulling to the bottom, change it, make new acquaintances, communicate with like-minded people. Always next to you should be people in front of whom it will be a shame to slide down. Compete with them in achievements, this develops the habit of growing, and the joy of victory always reinforces self-respect;
• Learn to say no. Refuse each time calmly and confidently when the promise is contrary to your interests. You don't owe anything to anyone;
• When making a promise, keep it in full so as not to be a windbag. Nobody respects such people;
• Repay debts in full, reciprocate kindness, help those who find time for you;
• Recognize the right to make a mistake, do not engage in self-flagellation. Any mistake is just an experience, another step towards wisdom. Learn your lesson and move on;

Figure out what you want in life and work to get it. Each small victory will add weight to the treasury of self-respect.

Instruction

The way a person treats himself is a direct reflection of his attitude towards others. And low self-esteem spoils not only relationships and deprives a lot of opportunities, but also almost completely destroys life. The one who does not respect and does not appreciate himself - does not live. So the first thing you should do is to understand this simple truth.

Remember that any thought is material, and the negative that you think about yourself is sure to be embodied in. Start thinking about yourself in a positive way, stop scolding, and vice versa - praise. Even if, while saying words of approval to yourself, you internally disagree with them, continue. Do it regularly. Over time, you will feel that all these good thoughts about you no longer seem so alien and strange, and you yourself somehow imperceptibly began to correspond to them.

Assess yourself objectively. If you have a problem with respect and self-love, you think you are full of flaws. Write down all your problematic qualities on a piece of paper and analyze each one. Remember how and when the last time you showed this or that quality, think about why it happened. When problems are structured, the fear of them fades away, and the moment comes when they can be solved.

However, you will clearly find several characteristics whose origin you cannot explain. They appeared either thanks to the people who once appropriated them to you, or, so to speak, “to the heap”. Think about whether this applies to you, whether it is fiction of outsiders. If so, feel free to cross out these nothing meaningful words.

Now write down the qualities that you lack in order to start respecting yourself. Perhaps you would like to become more in yourself, stop being lazy or cheat. Evaluate whether it is so difficult to instill these qualities in yourself, what is needed for them to become yours, and why you still do not possess them. You will see that it only takes one small step to love yourself.

Now it's time to describe all your positive traits. This will be very difficult to do, but necessary. You will be surprised that, it turns out, you cook great, you have a beautiful voice, you are kind and accurate, but how can you not appreciate yourself for this?

Start respecting yourself in practice. Put yourself in order, put on beautiful clothes, style your hair. You excess weight? What's the use of myself for this, it's better to sign up for a gym and discover a varied menu of healthy food. Take care of your health, take care of yourself, because there is no one like you, you are unique, and therefore you must love and take care of yourself.

Your environment is a direct reflection of your attitude towards yourself. Therefore, it is very important that a person has acquaintances, people of similar interests, and communication with them brings mutual pleasure and benefit. Therefore, stop shutting yourself off from the whole world, because it will not harm you if you yourself do not want it.

Keep yourself and look for exits. For example, to make it easier with laziness, find yourself an interesting hobby that you can enthusiastically engage in for a long time. And then you will see that you are not such a lazy person, you just had to find something to your liking.

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• how to learn to appreciate yourself

A person who has learned to value himself is generally much more successful and harmonious. The thing is that, estimating ourselves fairly, we treat everything and everyone around us in the same way, and this is the key point and the secret of happiness.

Instruction

To learn to appreciate yourself, you must first love yourself. But not with that selfish love, but simply with the understanding that you are alone, you are unique, and everything that you are doing now, you are doing for yourself. Of course, there are still relatives, there are friends, but admit that, first of all, you are calmer and when they are doing well. Self-love is the key to all others.

You have thousands of plans, deeds, ideas, and you strive to fulfill this soon. Here you have reached one, go immediately to the next, and so on. Stop. Thank yourself for what you have already done, to the fullest. Enjoy the moment of your little triumph, taste the aroma of victory. Isn't that why you've been walking so long? Otherwise, the main idea of ​​achievement disappears and a meaningless race begins.

This rule applies not only to big things, but also to the daily schedule. If you know how to work, then learn how to rest. Appreciate not only your professional skills, but also your hobbies, your body, your personal space. All this should be in your

Many of us are unhappy in life and relationships only because we have not learned to love ourselves first of all.

Self-love is important not only for personal happiness, but also for success in life - such people are ready for great achievements, they feel much more confident, and boldly defend their boundaries and interests.

Whatever you do, love yourself for it. Whatever you feel, love yourself for feeling it.
Tadeusz Golas

Take care of yourself

Modern world and this crazy rhythm of life does not contribute to a person learning to love himself. We are daily imposed with many obligations, unnecessary desires and aspirations. Non-compliance with the established framework and stereotypes leads to rejection by society and the system.

The problem is not that it is difficult to comply with these established norms, but that they change every day. In all this turmoil, the eternal race for illusory ideals, we often completely forget about ourselves.

In order to learn to love yourself, it is important to take the time to listen to yourself. Be attentive to yourself, your personal, non-imposed desires and needs. Listen carefully to the voice of your heart, which is often drowned out by cries from outside.

Stop right now and think - what you are doing is really your personal desire. Which of your desires and needs have you ignored and suppressed because of embarrassment, fear of being misunderstood, condemned? Be attentive to yourself, not to the voices of the world around you.

Take care of your health

Often, especially young people, forget that health is the most valuable resource, which is very difficult, and sometimes impossible to restore. Reconsider your attitude to your own body - love it through taking care of your health.

Here are some tips from psychologists to help you love yourself:

• Plan a trip to a polyclinic or a private diagnostic center in the near future and undergo a complete examination of the whole body. Find out what diseases you have and start treatment gradually.
• Go to the dentist - often people spare money for this, postpone the procedure of dental treatment for later, and in the end - they are left without them in a relatively young age. Stop putting off until tomorrow what needs to be done yesterday!
• Review your diet - go to the kitchen and start throwing away all processed foods, dangerous ready-made sauces, unnatural seasonings. Throw away anything that can harm you. Make a healthy menu for the week - you will spend 5 minutes on this, and you can extend your life by at least a couple of years. Based on this, buy groceries, and be sure to make sure that there are always a lot of fruits, vegetables and herbs on your table.
• Start playing sports - this is not only a way to show love and care for your own body, but also a great opportunity to get more vitality and get a great figure.
• Be sure to let yourself good conditions for sleep. Do not be stingy and get a comfortable mattress, natural bedding, comfortable pillows. Much in our life depends on how and how much we sleep, so it’s worth taking care of your sleep.
• Find time and money to go to a health resort once a year, take a course of purification with mineral waters, or at least go once a month for a preventive massage.
• Do not forget that sometimes our body gives us signals that it needs to rest and recover. This can manifest itself as laziness.

Be attentive to your health - our body gives us signals, it is only important to learn to recognize them and respond in a timely manner.

Take care of your appearance

Most people gather carefully before leaving the house. Women remove makeup, do manicures, pedicures, hairstyles, depilation. Men shave, put on ironed shirts, suits, apply perfume, style the unruly strands of their beards. And who are they doing it for? That's right, for the people around you.

But, true self-love lies in taking care of your appearance not for the sake of other people, but first of all, for yourself. Therefore, even when you are at home - comb your hair, dress comfortably, but beautifully, and women can safely do their own makeup.

On weekends, you can visit beauty salons - if you wish, you will find funds for this. Buy yourself everything you need to look perfect - this is not only an act of self-love, but also a good investment in prolonging your youth and beauty.

The way you look now is a reflection of your self-love. See how much you love yourself, and start working on your appearance.

Comfortable communication

Another step on the path to self-respect and self-love is to cleanse your own environment of those people who bring you negativity.

Now it is important to consider:

• How many of the people around you make you angry and want to kill them?
• Who haven't you sent to all four sides just out of courtesy?
• Who constantly brings you to tears with their rudeness?
• Or maybe there are those who constantly get out and with their cunning and resourcefulness make you moan from impotence to resist them in any way?

Your love for yourself will be send them to hell and completely limit communication with such people. Become the person who chooses his own social circle and brings only those people with whom he does not have to constantly suffer and experience negative emotions.

If you don't love yourself, what do you want from others?

Don't be afraid of loneliness drive away the unworthy because your life is short and you probably don't want to live it next to idiots.

No need to feel guilty about wanting to be happy and comfortable around sincere and understanding people. smart people This is your personal right and you deserve it!

It is important for every person to be able to love themselves. Self-love is taking care of yourself, satisfying desires, accepting your body and personality.

Loving yourself can be difficult, because from childhood, many are taught to give themselves to others, to be respectful of their elders, and to put themselves lower. Most have low self-esteem due to external influences, which can be difficult to raise.

Long reflections on the topic of why a person has low self-esteem, and he does not love himself, can be carried out for a long time, but it is better to immediately move on to action and really change:

• First, it's worth doing physical condition. Starting to play sports, you can feel the rise of energy, and over time, a toned shape will definitely give self-confidence. You just have to choose interesting view sports and get started.
• Secondly, you need learn to compliment yourself. In the morning, preening to go to work, you need to say nice things about your appearance and internal state, tune in to a successful and productive day.
• Third, worth learn to find yourself strengths and highlight them. If a girl has a particular appearance, she can focus on them with clothes or makeup. If a person has any unusual abilities, can show them to friends or even the whole world through the Internet.

It is also worth considering the weak or superfluous sides of your personality. How to change them? How do you get better at something? How to acquire a new skill? By answering questions like these, you can recognize what you need to work on and build an action plan based on that.

Also, when working on yourself, you must constantly analyze changes. You need to compare yourself with your past self - in no case with other people. You can be inspired by someone else’s experience, but you can’t wallow in envy or compare yourself with the fact that after years of hard work you have achieved the current result.

If you feel discomfort in a collision with a person of a higher level in a certain area, then it is better to keep a distance from such people so as not to hurt yourself. You can start communicating with them after, when you can get closer to their level.

You can love yourself by creating a positive image of yourself. It is necessary to think over the image of the future "I" from appearance to character and behavior.

The next step is to change your mind. At this stage, a rethinking of the attitude towards oneself is carried out. It is necessary not to justify your destructive actions, but to turn them into strengths. For example, some slowness of a person can be useful, as it protects against impulsive purchases of unnecessary things.

On the path of self-improvement, positive attitudes serve as a powerful tool. Having a mindset for success, realizing the inevitability of failures on the way and trying to cope with them, after a while each person will be able to reveal the full potential of his essence and love himself.

Self-love is the basis for a free and happy life that every person deserves, so you need to work on yourself, overcoming difficulties on the way to personal success.

Praise yourself for achievements and get rid of self-criticism

Many of us simply cannot live a day without blaming ourselves three hundred times for all the troubles and problems.

Our inner critic- this is such a vile creature that is constantly trying to kill self-confidence, crush self-condemnation with a tombstone, destroy motivation. In order for it not to destroy us and our love for ourselves, we need to get rid of it - our inner critic.

Instead of constantly beating yourself up, start turning a blind eye to some of your shortcomings and praising your accomplishments.

Allow yourself to enjoy every, even small success. Praise yourself - by doing this you will not only show love for yourself, but also raise faith in yourself and your success!

Self respect

Faced with difficult situation, people routinely fall into one of the following errors.

"Life is too hard to live." And the logical conclusion of this thought is the thought of suicide.

"I'm too worthless to claim anything." And a person clogs into a distant hole, avoiding any relationship.

"I don't want to see it." And a person clogs his head with any stupefying poisons: alcohol, drugs, fly agaric.

These are all ways of self-destruction. It is possible to resist them. You have a beautiful and perfect brain - a magnificent mechanism created by nature as ideal remedy survival. You can either destroy it or put it at your service.

And to begin with, let's return to the errors that we have listed and try to think about what they mean. Take the phrase "Life is too hard to live." And now let's turn it into a question: "Is life always too difficult?" Obviously not.

It is difficult as soon as you are forced to do work that is unpleasant for you. But who forced you? You yourself. No one else.

Why are you forcing yourself to do unpleasant work? Try to be your own friend. And in a friendly way, decide how best to get out of the situation. Look for options, learn new tricks.

This woodpecker can only bang his head on a piece of wood. But you are not a woodpecker! Your possibilities are endless. In any difficult situation, start with self-respect.

You deserve a happy life!

If right now something did not work out, then you need to shift it. Roll up your sleeves and shift.

Remember, you were not born as a bag into which the world should pour all sorts of blessings. You were born a warrior who must win these blessings. Do not grieve that you have not been given something. You are not a wretched cripple who needs to be given something. Once you focus on your poverty, humiliation and dissatisfaction, then you are doomed. Your powerful subconscious will keep you at the bottom of the pit.

Conversely, imagine what you need. And you will step on the path to achieve this. Respect your wishes and they will come true.

Self-respect is respect for the world. Because we are part of life. In harmony with the world, you can reach any heights.

Who is guilty?

There is also a loophole of a lazy mind - to find the one to blame for all the troubles, and all day to honor corrupt politicians, greedy oligarchs and thieving officials.

Yes everything is correct. They do all sorts of bad things there, but you can't refer to them. Because specifically in your unsuccessful life, they are not to blame.

Which politician didn't let you take care of your health?

What oligarch poured buckets of beer on you?

Which official made you yell at your life partner?

You alone are to blame for your failures. Don't hide from the truth. Feel free to look into her eyes.

No need to refer to any bad uncles who do not even know about your existence. All these crooks will get their way one way or another. But this has nothing to do with you.

Fighting spirit

So, in front of you is an obstacle course. And it's inspiring. We warriors are used to it. It is only necessary to coordinate consciousness and subconsciousness. To do this, look with an open eye at the obstacle course in front of you, and mentally imagine the best result.

In this ideal result, you operate as efficiently as possible. Easily overcome all obstacles. Your body is tight and flexible. Your mind is clear and free. And you achieve a clear and understandable goal.

No need to dream abstractly. In a difficult situation, your image should be extremely specific. If you don't have a roof over your head, then think about your home. How big will it be, how many rooms, is there a fireplace.

If you do not have enough money, then imagine exactly how you will receive it and what you will spend it on. No need to think something like: "More money, but I'll buy what I want." This wish is too abstract, so it will never come true. But a specific amount will immediately help you decide whether it is worth changing jobs.

If you are single, then imagine what your friend or girlfriend will be like. Kind, smart, intelligent. What will you talk about with him, where will you go. And now you already know where it can be found.

The mood for a dream must be done before going to bed. Lie down relaxed. Mentally replay the movie of success. At night, the subconscious mind will prepare those skills and abilities that will help you do just that.

From the book Black Magic of Sales [or All Your Money is Temporarily Stored by the Buyer] the author Kayum Leonid

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What is respect - each person has his own concept of this socio-cultural phenomenon. Both infants and people of advanced age need respect, this basic need gives a person a sense of the need and significance of himself in his family, profession, society.

What is respect - definition

Recognition of rights, dignity, the ability to see and take into account the boundaries, personal characteristics of another person - this is what respect means. Deeds worthy of respect affect society and are always encouraged, creating a positive reputation. Respect for oneself and others begins in the family, so it is important to cultivate this feeling from the very beginning. early age on which the harmonious development of the personality depends.

How is respect shown?

How to win respect frequently asked question those who are just starting their career, business or family relationships. Showing respect is multifaceted, and consists of both subtle everyday actions, actions, and having great value. Being a respected person and respecting others is an integral part of happiness and an affirmation of the recognition of the virtues of another. How do people show respect?

• expressing gratitude is a simple action that has powerful power and does not take much time;
• compliments and expressions of admiration;
• the ability to put oneself in the place of another;
• fulfillment of these promises;
• the ability to listen to the end without interrupting;
• if there is criticism, it is not aimed at humiliating a person, but only at specific blunders in a deed or deed.

What is respect for elders?

Respect for elders goes hand in hand with respect for parents. Deep respect for the elderly, as those who have gone through difficult trials in life, was in the order of things for people of the past. What is respect for elders?

• polite attitude;
• tactful behavior;
• manifestation of care and attention (transfer across the road, carry a heavy bag, give way in transport);
• providing assistance to those in need.

What is respect in a relationship?

What is respect for a person? To this question, everyone sees their own answer, but in general, it is to see in the other an individuality, a personality with its own characteristics and versatility and the understanding that God or nature loves diversity, therefore people are all different. Friendship, partnership, family relations have their own characteristics, but respect in them is built on the basis of general principles:

• respect for personal boundaries, space and non-intrusion;
• the opinion of a friend, partner, spouse may be different from your own - it is important to treat this with acceptance and flexibility;
• vision in another autonomous personality;
• providing support and assistance in difficult periods, situations.

What is respect for nature?

Respect for nature is closely related to compassion for all living beings and concern for the world around us. The situation on the planet is such that people for the most part waste resources: they pump out oil - the blood of the earth, as a result of which voids are formed, litter nature with waste, kill animals on a large scale - all this comes from disrespect and disrespect. "After us, even a flood!" - so said the French king Louis XV, today humanity is facing the consequences of such an attitude.

What is respect for nature?

• replenishment of used resources;
• caring for animals and birds in winter;
• measures aimed at improving the environmental situation;
• taking under protection rare species of animals, birds, plants;
• introduction of ecological fuels that do not pollute the atmosphere.

What is respect for work?

For the first time, the child is faced with the world of professions at school and respect for the teacher becomes basic, defining. AT modern schools teachers are often treated with disdain and devaluing their hard work. The task of parents and teachers is to form value for any kind of profession, little child it is important to show and explain this with an example, that if the janitor did not clean the snow, people would be stuck in snowdrifts, and without teachers, a person would be illiterate, would not be able to write and read, many great discoveries would not have been made, magnificent books would not have been would be written.

What is respect for parents?

Respect for parents is formed in childhood. The way mother and father treat each other lays the foundation in children for respect for themselves, parents and other people. It is not a discovery for anyone that children read patterns of behavior from their parents and appropriate them for themselves. If parents insult each other, the child is forced to go over to the side of one of them, and in relation to the other he will feel like a traitor, and defensive reaction will look like a manifestation of disrespect for the one whom the child “betrays”.

What is gratitude and respect for parents, how is it manifested:

• lack of reproaches to parents (they gave little, they brought up poorly, they didn’t buy an apartment), the most valuable thing that parents gave is life;
• honoring parents as elders, even if they are wrong, do not enter into conflict because of this;
• devoting time and attention to their parents (calls, visits, conversations, help).

How to get respect?

Respect is a mutual concept: without the recognition and respect of others, you cannot count on respect in your direction. Each person has something to respect, but not everyone understands this. How to gain respect in a team:

• Sincere compliments:
• rejoice in the success of others, celebrate it;
• empathize with failures;
• be open and friendly;
• not allow ridicule in your address;
• cultivate professionalism.

Self respect

The need for respect is one of the most important basic needs, this is how a person identifies himself: “I am!”, “I am significant!”. Self-respect is formed for oneself and is included in the "I-concept" of the individual, which is formed on the basis of a person's assessment important people, further to public institutions. What is self-respect - there is no one characteristic parameter here, these are all components of self-esteem:

• knowing your strengths and weaknesses;
• striving for self-improvement and personal growth;
• honesty with oneself;
• work with shortcomings;
• recognition of their merits and contribution as an individual to society;
• self-worth as a person;
• awareness of one's divine essence;

Respect in the family

What is mutual understanding and respect in the family? Bert Hellinger, a German psychotherapist, once said that respect is a vessel, a form, and love is what fills this vessel, if there is no respect in the family, there can be no talk of love. Respect for a man as the head of a clan has always been a tradition among many peoples; children brought up in such a family saw significance and authority. For sons to see the attitude of the mother towards their father, based on respect. A man who makes his choice of wife must also understand that if there is no respect for his wife, then this is disrespect for himself.

What does it mean to show love and respect for each other?

• moral support and appropriate sympathy;
• lack of insults, assault;
• confidence;
• taking into account opinions and compromise in case of disagreements;
• warm and kind words;
• joint decision-making important for the family;
• caring for every member of the family;
• joint contribution to the upbringing of children and the improvement of everyday life;
• constructive criticism.