Until 1886, scientists, although they knew about the existence Gospels of Peter, did not have a single quote from it. Origen accidentally mentions it in his Comments on Matthew(10, 17) when talking about the brothers of Jesus. Eusebius conveys the negative opinion of Bishop Serapion, which he expressed after reading this apocryphal gospel (see ch. V. 1,3).

In the winter of 1886/87, a large fragment of Gospels of Peter. This is a Greek manuscript from the 8th century; a smaller but much older fragment was later discovered at Oxyrhynchus.

The surviving text tells of the passion, death, and burial of Jesus, and completes the account of the resurrection with an account of the miracles associated with it. The responsibility for the death of Jesus rests solely with the Jews, Pilate is acquitted. Here and there traces of docetism are visible, and perhaps that is why the cry of Christ on the cross (“My God, my God, why did you leave me?”) Is conveyed like this: “My strength, my strength, why did you leave me ?”

Written probably in Syria around the middle of the 2nd century (or even earlier), Gospel of Peter indicates the author's familiarity with all the canonical gospels. However, in all likelihood, he did not give them much great importance. After analyzing its textual relationships with various groups of New Testament manuscripts, Vaganei shows that in a significant number of cases it is consistent only with the Old Syriac type of text. According to Denker's research, almost all passion narratives are based on references to Old Testament, mainly to Isaiah and the Psalms. Denker believes that Gospel of Peter- a product of Judeo-Christianity, written between two Jewish uprisings.

Characteristics This gospel can be seen in the story of the resurrection of Christ:

35. And behold, in the night in which the Day of the Lord dawned, when the soldiers were guarding two in each guard, there was a thunder from heaven. 36. And they saw how the heavens opened, and two men came down from there, embraced with radiance, and approached the tomb. 37. And the stone that was rolled against the entrance to the tomb itself rolled to the side, and the tomb was opened, and both men went inside.

10.38 When the soldiers saw all this, they woke up the centurion and the elders, because they were also watching there. 39. And as they were telling them all that they had seen, there appeared three men coming out of the tomb, and two supported the third, and the cross followed them. 40. The heads of these two reached the heavens, but the head of the one they led was higher than the heavens. 41. And they heard a voice from heaven, crying out: “Have you preached to those who sleep?” 42. And the answer was heard from the cross: "Yes."

In conclusion, let us say that if we compare the previous, very common apocryphal gospels (and the samples from Nag Hammadi diverging with them; see ch. IV. 1, 4), then we can appreciate the difference between the character of the canonical Gospels and the almost banal content of most apocrypha II and III centuries. Although some of them claimed apostolic authorship, and two canonical gospels did not bear apostolic names (out of 12), these four, and only they, rested on a solid foundation. The reason, perhaps, is that they were recognized as reliable, and reliable in two senses. First, the events they recount were widely regarded as authentic; secondly, the interpretation of these events was recognized as truly apostolic. Even Gospel of Peter and Gospel of Thomas, which retain traces of independent tradition, are both theologically and historically untenable in the face of the four narratives that alone are recognized as canonical.

GOSPEL FROM PETER

1.1. ... But none of the Jews washed their hands, neither Herod nor any of His judges. And when no one wanted to bathe, Pilate got up. 2. Then King Herod orders to take the Lord, saying to them: "What I ordered you to do with Him, do."

2.3. Joseph, a friend of Pilate and the Lord, was there, and seeing that they intended to crucify Him, he went to Pilate and asked for the body of the Lord for burial. 4. And Pilate sent to Herod to ask for a body. 5. Herod said: “Brother Pilate, even if no one asked, we would have buried Him, since the Sabbath is coming, for it is written in the Law: the sun should not set on the slain” - and handed Him over to the crowd before the first day of the Feast of Unleavened Bread .

3.6. And they, having taken him, pursued him and fled, pushing him, and saying: "We persecute the Son of God, having received power over him." 7. And they clothed Him in purple and seated Him in the judgment seat, saying, “Judge righteously, O king of Israel.” 8. And one of them brought a crown of thorns and placed it on the head of the Lord. 9. And some who stood (nearby) spat in his eyes, others struck him on the cheeks, others poked him with a reed stick, and some scourged him, saying: “This is the honor we will honor the Son of God.”

4.10. And they brought two villains and crucified the Lord between them in the middle: He was silent, as if he did not feel any pain. 11. And when they raised the cross, they wrote (on it): "This is the king of Israel." 12. And laying His garments before Him, they divided them and cast lots among themselves. 13. But one of the wicked rebuked them, saying: “We suffer so because of the evil that we have done. He, who appeared as the Savior of people, what harm has He done to you?” 14. And being indignant with him, they ordered that his legs should not be broken, so that he would die in torment.

5.15. It was already noon, and darkness enveloped all of Judea. And they began to worry and fear that the sun had not set and He was still alive. For it is prescribed to them that the sun should not set on the dead. 16. Then one of them said, “Give Him gall and vinegar to drink,” and they mixed it and gave it to drink. 17. And they fulfilled everything and committed sins on their heads. 18. And many went about with lamps, and believing that the night had come, they went to rest. 19. And the Lord cried out: “My strength, my strength, you have left me!” And having said this, he ascended. 20. And at that same hour the veil in the temple of Jerusalem was torn in two.

6.21. And then they pulled the nails out of the hands of the Lord and laid Him on the ground. And the whole earth shook, and great fear began. 22. Then the sun shone, and it became clear that it was still the ninth hour. 23. The Jews rejoiced and gave Joseph his body to bury the body, for he saw how much good he had done. 24. And he took the Lord, washed him and wrapped him in a veil, and carried him to his own tomb, which is called the garden of Joseph.

7.25. Then the Jews, and the elders, and the priests, realizing what harm they had done to themselves, began to beat their breasts and say: “Alas, our sins! Judgment is coming and the end of Jerusalem.” 26. But I and my comrades were sad, and, contrite in spirit, we hid, for they were looking for us as villains and those who wanted to burn the temple. 27. Because of all this we fasted and sat mourning and weeping night and day until the Sabbath.

8.28. The assembled scribes, and the Pharisees, and the elders heard that the whole people grumbled and beat their breasts, saying: “If at death. His great signs have come, you see how righteous He is.” 29. They were frightened and went to Pilate, asking him and saying: 30. “Give us soldiers so that we can guard His grave for three days, so that His disciples do not come and steal Him and the people do not think that He has risen from the dead and would not harm us.” 31. Pilate gave them Petronius the centurion to guard the tomb. And the elders and the scribes went with them to the tomb. 32. And, having rolled a large stone, together with the centurion and the soldiers, they rolled to the entrance to the tomb. 33. And having sealed it with seven seals, they pitched their tent and began to guard.

9.34. Early in the morning, when the Sabbath dawn began, a crowd came from Jerusalem and its environs to see the sealed tomb. 35. And on the same night, when the day of the Lord dawned, - the soldiers guarded each guard two by two - a loud voice was heard in the sky. 36. And they saw how the heavens were opened and two men descended from there, radiating radiance and approaching the tomb. 37. The stone that was nailed to the door, fell off by itself, moved away, and the tomb opened, and both young men entered.

10.38. And when the soldiers saw this, they woke up the centurion and the elders, for they too were there guarding (the tomb). 39. And when they told what they saw, they again saw three people coming out of the tomb, two supporting one, and a cross following them. 40. And the heads of two reached the sky, and the one who was led by the hand had a head higher than the sky. 41. And they heard a voice from heaven: “Have you told the dead?” 42. And there was an answer from the cross: "Yes."

(They say... that he came and said, as it says in their gospel, which is called according to the Jews:) I came to abolish the sacrifices, if you do not leave the sacrifices, the wrath of God will not leave you (Ibid. 30. 10).

What would you like us to cook for you for your Passover dinner? - Do you think that I want to eat the body with you like Easter? (Ibid. 22. 4).

Fragments of the Gospel of the Jews and commentaries

And so it happened, when the Lord was coming out of the water, the holy spirit came down and filled him, and rested in him, and said to him: My Son, of all the prophets I have waited for you, that you must come and I can rest in you, for you are mine. rest, my firstborn son, and you will rule forever (Jerome. Commentaries on the Prophets. Commentaries on the New Testament (Commentarii in sexdecim prophetas. Commentarii in Novum Testamentum). Com in Is. 11. 2. Next: Com. in...).

So did My mother, the Holy Spirit, took Me by the hair and carried me to Mount Tabor (Origen. Comments on the Gospel of John (Commentarii in Joannem). 11. 12. Next: Com. in In.).

(Written in the Gospel of the Jews): He who marvels will reign, and he who reigns will find peace (Clement of Alexandria. Strom. II.IX.25).

And never be joyful unless you treat your brother with love (Jerome. Com. in Ephes. 3. 4).

And when the Lord gave the linen to the servant of the priest, He went to Jacob and appeared to him. For Jacob swore that he would not eat bread from the hour he drank the cup of the Lord until he saw him rise up. And after that, the Lord said: Bring a table and bread (And immediately added): He took bread and blessed it, and broke it, and gave it to James the Righteous, and said: My brother, eat your bread, for the Son of man has risen among the sleeping (Jerome . O famous men(De viris illustribus). 2. Next: De vir. ill.).

Out of Egypt I called My Son, and therefore He must be called a Nazirite (Ibid. 3).

The Lord's mother and brothers said to him: John the Baptist baptizes for the remission of sins, let's go and be baptized. But He said to them: What sin have I committed that I should be baptized of him? Unless My words are a sin through ignorance (Jerome. Adversus Pelagium).

Give us our tomorrow's bread today (Jerome Com. in Math. 6. 11).

If your brother has sinned in a word and repented, forgive him seven times a day. Simon, His disciple, said to Him: Seven times a day? The Lord answered him: Yes, I tell you, seventy times seven. For the prophets, after the Holy Spirit had anointed them, the word of sin was found (Nero. Adversus Pelagium. III.2).

Another of the two rich men said: Master, what good shall I do in order to gain eternal life? He said to him: Man, keep the Law and the prophets. He answered Him: I do. Then he said to him: Go and sell everything you have and give to the poor, and then come and follow Me. But the rich man began to scratch his head, and these words did not please him. And the Lord said: How can you say that you have fulfilled the Law? For it is written in the Law: Love your neighbor as yourself. And look, many of your brothers, the sons of Abraham, are soiled with mud and are dying of hunger, but your house is full of good things, and none of this goes to them? And He turned to Simon, his disciple, who was sitting next to Him, and said: Simon, son of Jonas, it is easier for a camel to enter into the eye of a needle than for a rich man into the kingdom of heaven (Origen. Com. in Matth. XV).

... in the gospel written by the Jews, which fell into our hands, the threat is directed not against the one who hid the talent, but against the one who lived dissolutely, for he (the master) had three servants, the one who squandered a fortune with harlots and flutists , the one who multiplied what he received, and the one who hid the talent; and the master accepted one with joy, only reproached the other, and sent the third to prison ... (Eusebius. In Mattheum, 25. 14).

And when He came to Peter and those who were with Peter, He said to them: Look, touch Me and see that I am not a disembodied spirit. And they touched Him and believed (Jerome. De viris ill. 16). (In the gospel used by the Ebionites and Nazarenes, and which we have recently translated from Hebrew into Greek, and which is considered by many to be the authentic (gospel) of Matthew, the man with the withered hand is called a stonemason, who pleaded for help in these words): I was a stonemason and earned a living with my own hands, I ask You, Jesus, restore my health so that I do not beg in disgrace for alms (Jerome. Com. in Matth. 12. 13).

Papias also tells the story of a woman who was accused of many crimes before the Lord, which is also written in the Gospel of the Jews (Eusebius. N.E. 111. 39) .

The gospel, written in Hebrew script, says that it was not the veil of the temple that was torn apart, but the architrave of enormous size collapsed (Jerome. Com. in Matth. 27. 51).

In the gospel used by the Nazarenes, instead of "son of Barrachia" it is written "son of Joiada" (Filii Jojadae. - Ibid. 23. 35).

"Barrabas" is explained in the gospel called "From the Jews" as "the son of their teacher" (Ibid. 27. 16).

I have chosen those who are most worthy, the most worthy are those whom my Father in heaven has given me (Epiphanius. Com. in Matth. 10. 3–8).

Gospel of Peter and Commentary

About the Gospel of Peter

Among the apocrypha of the New Testament tradition, a fragment of the Gospel of Peter occupies a special place. It was discovered in Egypt in 1886 in the tomb of a medieval monk; there were the Apocalypse of Peter and the Book of Enoch. The parchment manuscript itself most likely dates back to the 8th-9th centuries, but the text was created much earlier; the language and style of the fragment of the Gospel and the Apocalypse of Peter are connected with the circle of early Christian literature. Apparently, these texts were placed in the monk’s grave as a kind of amulets, and, perhaps, the owner and admirer of the precious texts for him, forbidden by the orthodox church, did not want to part with them even after death…

The passage from the Gospel of Peter begins in mid-sentence and ends in mid-sentence as well. However, the scribe did not know more than what was preserved; before the beginning and after the end of the passage, an ornament of woven ribbons and crosses was drawn. The identification of the found fragment with the Gospel of Peter is based on the fact that the text is written in the first person and the author calls himself Simon Peter.

In order to correctly assess the place of the apocryphal writings associated with the name of Peter in the general mass of early Christian literature, a few words should be said about how Peter is portrayed in various writings of Christians.

Peter (Greek - stone, Aramaic - Cephas) ​​plays a significant role in Christian writings and legends. According to the New Testament gospels, he and his brother Andrew were the first to be called by Jesus to be among his disciples. The list of the twelve apostles in the canonical gospels begins with the name of Peter (Mk. 3. 16–19; Matt. 10. 2–4; OK. 6. 1416). Peter was, according to the gospels, a fisherman, and it was to him and his brother, when called, that Jesus said: “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men” (Mk. 1. 17).

Wed the speeches of the Qumranites against sacrifices (Amusin I D Dec. op. pp. 135-138), in the New Testament the condemnation of sacrifices is found in the most categorical form in the Epistle to the Hebrews, where it is said: “Burnt offerings and sacrifices for sin are displeasing to You” ( 10. 6 and in a number of other places of this Epistle)

Concerning this passage, Epiphanius writes that the Ebionites "reverse" the sayings: cf. in the Gospel of Matthew, where the disciples ask Jesus the same question, and Jesus in response gives them instructions on where to "celebrate" the Passover ( 26. 17-18), in Luke Jesus tells the disciples: “I have longed to eat this Passover with you before I suffer” ( 22. 25), in all likelihood, the words about the "reversal" of the speech refer specifically to the Gospel of Luke. Jesus' response to the Ebionites reflected their distaste for meat.

Elsewhere Clement (Strom V XIV 96) gives a more detailed version of the saying, but without reference to the Gospel of the Jews. “The one who seeks will not stop until he finds, and the one who finds will be amazed, and the one who will be amazed will rule, and the one who rules will find peace” Parallel to this saying is contained in the Oxyrhynchus logies (Par Ox 654 I 5a ) and, accordingly, in the Coptic text of the Gospel of Thomas; in logic: "Let the seeker not stop... found, and when he found, he was surprised... surprised, he will rule... find rest"; Thomas: “Jesus said: Let him who seeks not stop seeking until he finds, and when he finds, he will be shocked, and if he is shocked, he will be surprised, and he will reign over all » (2). The coincidence of these passages allows us to assume that the passage quoted by Clement was taken not from the Gospel of the Jews, but from the Greek version of the Gospel of Thomas, reflected in the Oxyrhynchus Logia. However, the coincidence of individual sayings in the Gnostic gospels and in the gospel of the Jews, despite the difference in genre, cannot be ruled out. The theme of "rest" occurs in a passage from the same gospel, albeit in a different context.

Gospel of Peter

Church historian Eusebius of Caesarea (c. 260-340 AD) writes that the First Epistle of Peter was accepted by the ancient elders and used by them, but other writings that went under the name of this apostle were rejected (Church history 3.3.1–4). Rejected writings attributed to Peter included: the second epistle (apparently 2 Peter), the apocalypse (i.e. the Apocalypse of Peter), the gospel (i.e. the Gospel of Peter) and the sermon (i.e. the Sermon of Peter). Further in his historical essay Eusebius mentions “the books that heretics are known as the “Gospels” of the apostles: Peter, Thomas, Matthias and others” (Church history 3.25.6). He goes on to mention the gospel attributed to Peter once more, this time in connection with Serapion, Bishop of Antioch (ministry: 199-211). Eusebius gives part of the epistle of this bishop, entitled: "On the so-called Gospel of Peter." Here is what Serapion writes:

We brethren accept Peter and the other apostles as Christ; but experienced people, we reject the books that go by their name, knowing that we have all been taught wrong. When I was with you, I assumed that you all adhere to the right faith, and, without reading the Gospel, which is reputed to be Petrov among them, I pointed out that if this is the only reason for your embarrassment, then you can read it. Now, having learned from what was told to me that their soul has slipped away, as into a hole, into heresy, I will hasten to you again, brothers, so wait for me soon. We have learned, brethren, what heresy Marcion held: he contradicted himself, not knowing himself what he was saying. You will know about it from what I wrote to you. We were able to get this "Gospel" from people who recognize it, that is, from the successors of those who introduced it and whom we call docets (there are a lot of their thoughts in this teaching), - we were able to get it thanks to them and found that in it much is in accordance with the right teaching of the Savior, but something has been added, which I present for you.

(church history 6.12.3–6).

Serapion's testimony confirms the existence of a book known as the Gospel of Peter, written sometime in the second century. However, the value of this testimony is limited, since Serapion says almost nothing about the content of the Gospel of Peter and does not quote it at all. No other church father, to our knowledge, also cites this source. Such a lack of information does not allow us to accurately determine whether certain apparently related manuscript finds really belong to this "Gospel".

In the winter of 1886-1887, during excavations in Akhmim (Egypt) in the tomb of a Christian monk was found handwritten book. The manuscript contained: a fragment of some gospel, passages from the Book of Enoch in Greek, the Apocalypse of Peter and, on the inside of the back cover of the codex, a story about the martyrdom of St. Justin. The gospel fragment has neither a title nor a subtitle: in addition, neither its beginning nor its end have been preserved. However, since the text refers to the apostle Peter in the first person [“But I, Simon Peter…” (v. 60)], since the text appears to be docetic in orientation (i.e., denies the physical reality of Jesus), and also due to its proximity to the Apocalypse of Peter, it is commonly believed that this is a fragment of the Gospel of Peter mentioned by Eusebius.

Critical assessments of this newfound gospel have varied greatly: some scholars, like Percival Gardner-Smith, have considered the passage independent of the New Testament gospels, while others, like Henry Barclay Sweet, have found it dependent on them. However, none of the participants in the dispute doubted that the Akhmim fragment was indeed part of the Gospel of Peter, dated to the 2nd century. This was taken for granted.

Then, in the 1970s and 1980s, two more Greek fragments from the Oxyrhynchus papyri, R.Ohu, were published. 2949 and R. Ohu. 4009, also more or less confidently identified as part of the Gospel of Peter. One of them apparently partially coincided with the Akhmim fragment. The publication of fragments revived interest in this gospel, since it seemed that the identity of the Akhmim fragment to the Gospel of Peter the 2nd century, accepted and then rejected by Serapion, was confirmed. In addition, it has been hypothesized that another early passage from the Gospel of Peter is the Fayum Fragment (P.Vindob. G 2325).

AT last years new life Gardner-Smith's positions were given by Helmut Koester and his circle of colleagues and students. According to Koester, “at the heart of the Gospel of Peter is ancient text sanctified by the authority of Peter and independent of the canonical gospels. Kester's student Ron Cameron agrees with this and concludes that this source is independent of the canonical gospels and perhaps even precedes them, and in addition, "could have served as a source for their alleged authors." This thesis was worked out in detail by John Dominic Crossan, who also agrees that the Akhmim fragment is part of the Serapion Gospel of Peter. In a lengthy study published in 1985, Crossan argues that the Gospel of Peter, although influenced in its later stages by the New Testament gospel tradition, retains the oldest tradition on which the Passion story in all four canonical gospels is based. This ancient tradition he calls the Gospel of the Cross.

Crossan's bold conclusion needs to be tested and evaluated. I will cite that selection from the Akhmim fragment, which, according to Crossan, reflects the ancient Gospel of the Cross, in my translation.

(25) Then the Jews and the elders, realizing what harm they had done to themselves, began to beat their breasts and say, “Alas! Our sins! Judgment is coming and the end of Jerusalem."

(28) The assembled scribes and Pharisees and elders heard that the whole people murmured and beat their breasts, saying: “If such great signs appeared at his death, see how righteous he is.”

(29) They were afraid and went to Pilate, asking him and saying:

(30) “Give us warriors so that we can guard his grave for three days, so that his disciples do not come and steal him, and the people do not think that he has risen from the dead and do us harm.”

(31) But Pilate gave them Petronius a centurion with soldiers to guard the tomb. And the elders and the scribes went with them to the tomb.

(32) And they rolled a large stone, along with the centurion and the soldiers, rolled to the entrance to the tomb.

(33) And having sealed it with seven seals, they pitched their tent and began to guard.

(34) Early on the Sabbath morning, a crowd came from Jerusalem and its surroundings to see the sealed tomb.

(35) That very night, as the day of the Lord dawned - and the soldiers were guarding two of each guard - a loud voice was heard in the sky.

(36) And they saw how the heavens were opened, and two men descended from there, radiating radiance and approaching the tomb.

(37) But the stone that was rolled against the door fell off by itself and moved away. The tomb opened and both youths entered.

(38) And when the soldiers saw this, they woke up the centurion and the elders - for they, too, were there guarding (the tomb).

(39) And when they told what they saw, they again saw three people coming out of the tomb, two supporting one, and a cross following them.

(40) And the heads of two reached the sky, and the one whom they led by the hand had a head higher than the sky.

(42) And the answer came from the cross: "Yes."

(45) Those who saw this, together with the centurion, hurried to Pilate, leaving the tomb, which they were guarding, and announced all that they had seen, in great confusion and excitement, saying: "Truly, the Son was God."

(46) Answering, Pilate said: “I am pure from the blood of the Son of God. That's what you decided."

(47) Then everyone asked him to order the centurion and the soldiers not to tell anyone about what they saw.

(48) For it is better, they said, that we be guilty of the greatest sin before God, and not fall into the hands of the people of the Jews and not be stoned.

(49) Then Pilate ordered the centurion and the soldiers not to tell anything*.

The hypothetical Crossan Gospel of the Cross contains elements suggesting that the Akhmim Fragment (or the Gospel of Peter) was written not before, but after, the Synoptic Gospels, especially the Gospels of Matthew and Mark. The self-accusation of the Jewish elders (7.25; 11.48), which clearly lacks historical realism, may have been partly inspired by Jesus' lamentation over Jerusalem and the prophecy concerning its fate (Luke 21:20-24; see Luke 23:48), and perhaps also by the ominous the speech of Caiaphas (John 11:49-50). Is it possible to assume that the tradition of the Akhmim fragment, in which "the Jews and the elders" with sorrow confess their sins and mourn the approach of "the judgment and the end of Jerusalem", is an ancient, independent tradition that arose before the Synoptic Gospels? Does this story not reflect the relationship between "Jews" and "Christians" after 70 AD, when various groups and subgroups of Jews were reduced mainly to two main movements [followers of Hillel (and Shammai) - and followers of Jesus], and the destruction of Jerusalem in 70 was understood by Christians as a punishment for the refusal of the Jews to recognize in Jesus the "Messiah"? Can it be said that the words: "It is better for us to be guilty of the greatest sin before God, but not fall into the hands of the people of the Jews" - precede what we find in the synoptic tradition? These words bear the stamp of Christian pious zeal, not constrained by the knowledge of Jewish religious beliefs. Moreover, they have an anti-Jewish orientation.

Also, the words of the people in Akhmim Fragment 8.28 (“the people all grumble and beat their breasts, saying: if such great signs appeared at his death, you see how righteous he is”), obviously represent a development of Luke 23:47–48 : “The centurion, seeing what was happening, glorified God and said: truly this man was a righteous man. And all the people who came together to see this spectacle, seeing what was happening, returned, beating their chests.

The author of the fragment of the Akhmim Gospel obviously had a poor understanding of the customs and beliefs of the Jews. According to 8:31 and 10:38, the Jewish elders and scribes pitched a tent in the cemetery to guard the tomb of Jesus with the Roman guards. Given the Jewish notion of the uncleanness of corpses, not to mention the fear of cemeteries at night, we have to admit that the author of our fragment is incredibly ignorant. Who could make up such a story just twenty years after Jesus' death? And even if someone wrote it - is it possible to imagine that the evangelist Matthew, undoubtedly a Jew, used the work of such an ill-informed author? It is hardly possible to believe in such a thing.

There are also more serious problems. The fear of the Jewish elders to fall into the hands of the people (Akhmim fragment 8.30) smacks not just of an exaggeration, but of a frank Christian apologetics. The “seven seals” (8.33) and the “crowd from Jerusalem and its environs”, which came “to see the sealed tomb” (9.34), clearly fulfill the apologetic tasks: to bring as many witnesses and evidence as possible in favor of the reality of the resurrection. These details appear to be secondary to canonical versions of the narrative. The expression "the day of the Lord" is another undoubted evidence of a late rather than an early date (cf. Rev. 1:10; Ignatius 9:1 to the Magnesians). The centurion's confession (Achmim fragment 11.45) seems to reflect a similar episode in Matthew (Mt 27:54; see also Mk 15:39, Lk 23:47).

Finally, can one seriously insist that the story in the Akhmim fragment about the resurrection - with a talking cross and giant-sized angels - is the very first, original message? That this particular message was used by the authors of the canonical gospels? Wouldn't it be more reasonable to assume that these details also testify to the secondary and fantastic character of this apocryphal writing? Do not all these testimonies confirm that the Akhmim gospel fragment is only a fusion of elements from the four canonical gospels, primarily from Matthew, generously colored with pious fantasy, inspired by apologetic concerns, and even with a touch of anti-Semitism?

No matter how one cleans and reconstructs this material (one asks why?), it is difficult to assume that it hides the oldest layer of tradition on which the stories of the Passion in the New Testament gospels are based. A generation or two ago, scholars found no independent traditions in the Akhmim fragment. Even now, many researchers come to the same conclusion. John Meyer dates this fragment to the 2nd century and calls it "a mosaic from the traditions of the canonical Gospels, passed through the memory and vivid imagination of Christians who often heard these Gospels read and preached on their basis." Moody-Smith asks a rhetorical question that exposes the controversial position of Crossan: "Is it possible to imagine that the tradition began with a narrative that was legendary, mythical, anti-Jewish, fantastic in essence - and then moved in the direction of sobriety and realism?" Apparently, Crossan is biased here: we have another case in which belief is generated by desire.

So, all the evidence suggests that the Akhmim gospel fragment is a later, and not an early work, even if we try to extract from it a hypothetical early substrate, arbitrarily cleared of imaginary later additions. But another question is more important: is it true that the Akhmim gospel fragment of the 9th century is in fact an excerpt from the Gospel of Peter of the 2nd century, condemned at the beginning of the 3rd century by Bishop Serapion? In the Akhmim fragment that we have, there is no indication of authorship, and the church fathers, who mention the Gospel of Peter, do not quote it at all and do not give us the opportunity to compare the texts and resolve this issue. In addition, there is no docetism in the Akhmim gospel fragment (which many noticed shortly after its publication). If it is not related to docetism, its connection with the Gospel of Peter becomes even weaker. We remember that Serapion emphasized that the Gospel of Peter was used by the docets to propagate their doctrine. Finally, as Paul Foster has shown, the connection between the Akhmim Gospel Fragment and small papyrus fragments dated to 200–250 is rather doubtful. Thus, we have no serious grounds to connect the Akhmim gospel fragment we have with the text of the 2nd century, which is mentioned by Bishop Serapion and some other authors of the late 2nd century under the name of the Gospel of Peter. Given its fantastic content and its obvious connection with later traditions, this gospel fragment clearly should not be used to study the historical Jesus.

Pyotr Nikolaevich Pluzhnikov.

Gospel of Peter.

Last testament.

Battle for Russia.

"Christ asked: - Who are you?
- We are from Russia".

The telephone rang in St. Peter's office. Peter picked up the phone.

I'm listening to.

This is Andrey. We have problems. We have big problems.

Speak.

Our scout was caught in the Russian sector of the underworld. Our angel.

What about him?

Why are you calling the open line?

So everyone knows. The devils have a holiday.

Everything. I'm waiting for myself.

Half an hour later, the Apostle Andrew was there.

Tell me everything in detail, - ordered St. Peter.

Six months ago, we drew attention to the fact that something was going on in Russia that was not right. Angels began to report that people come across without souls or with old souls.

Like this? - asked Peter.

But like this. No soul or used old soul. And a lot of devils divorced. They inhabit soulless people.

Andrew was silent. There was a painful pause.

And yet, - continued the Apostle Andrew, - after soulless people visit temples and churches, the faces of the saints on the icons with gold salaries turn black. Even the priests took notice. If it goes on like this, panic will rise.

Clearly, Peter interrupted him, - but I think that it is from Russia that the flow of souls to paradise has decreased. Only children and young people. Now everything is falling into place. Continue….

Three days ago, we threw our angel scout into hell. In the form of a devil, of course. But it was quickly revealed. He only managed to convey that the devils have introduced a new rule for souls with sins of light and moderate severity. UDO rule. Grant of parole. Once a month, they complete an information block with UDO souls and send it to Earth at the time of launch or landing. spaceship when all atmospheric protection is broken. And on Earth, these souls inhabit soulless people. The devils already have legends about souls that have several walkers. What do we do? It is necessary to report to Christ, - the Apostle Andrew fell silent.

He's gone now, I called several times. Answering machine answers. So we will have to solve this problem ourselves.

After a pause, he continued:

So Satan learned to kill souls.

And notice together with the guardian angels, - Andrey added.

Saint Peter looked at him.

Well, we can't handle this on our own, but about souls on parole is another matter. Reincarnation is forbidden by God. For this, Satan will receive in full. We need to meet with the head of the Russian sector of the underworld, Elder Devil Boris.
Okay, mind your own business, - Saint Peter ordered, - and I will arrange a meeting with Boris.
The meeting took place on neutral territory and was not official.
The elder devil Boris was not young. At first glance, he could be mistaken for an ordinary average devil, of average height, overgrown with week-old stubble. Only unnaturally large horns and a one and a half meter two-inch thick tail said that this was not a simple devil, but an elite one with a high status. But he was especially distinguished by his eyes burning like coals, hellish fire blazed in them.
He reeked of alcohol for a kilometer.

As always, not shaved and very drunk, - instead of a greeting, Peter said.

Whats up? - snarled the devil Boris.

You are playing with fire, - Peter continued, - souls with parole and reincarnation are forbidden by God himself.

Playing with fire is my direct occupation, - Boris answered.

After some thought, he said:

So your scout managed to report before his death.

Why did you kill him? We have a spy swap deal.

I don’t know, the devils have been completely unrestrained lately. So what do you need? It's all?

What got the angel?

He didn't go to the toilet according to ours. It's all?

No, not everything. The conditional early release of sinful souls and their transfer to soulless people is serious.
If he finds out himself, then most likely he will close this project. End of the world. And what the hell is waiting for you in this situation? Complete destruction. Do you need it?

"If Satan finds out about the leakage of information from my sector, then for me the end of the world will come even earlier," thought Boris.

This thought quickly cleared his mind and knocked out the alcohol. "It's good that he's gone now, he's gone somewhere."

There is no need to enlighten me, - said Boris to St. Peter, - they swam, we know.

Well, if you know, then another matter. And I thought that you, with your drunkenness, forgot everything a long time ago. It's all.

Saint Peter turned around and walked away. And the older devil Boris looked after him for a long time, nervously moving his hooves.

Returning to his office in hell, the devil Boris sat for an hour in deep thought, sucking on the current situation from all sides. It didn't turn out to be a good picture.

Wherever you throw a wedge everywhere. Chel!

He swore, took out a cigarette and lit it.
Then he pulled out a desk drawer, pulled out an empty glass and a bottle of vodka. Uncorked, poured half a glass and waved without biting. He exhaled loudly and sharply. Put down the glass, pressed the button to call the secretary on the selector.

I'm listening.

Call the head of the boiler room Yegor to me.

So he himself came half an hour ago.

Let him come in.

There was a knock on the door and it opened. On the threshold stood the devil Yegor. Yegor was appointed head of the boiler station, in which there were boilers and furnaces for sinners, not so long ago, and therefore not everything went smoothly for him.
The contingent in the boiler room was complex, devils of pre- and retirement age, as well as green youth, who still needed to be taught a lot.
Among the old devils, drunkenness flourished in the workplace, and the youth had no idea about labor discipline. Absenteeism, being late, and leaving work early were commonplace among them.
The devil Yegor stood drooping and looked at the floor.

Where is the greeting? Boris asked.

I greet you, Elder devil, - Yegor answered not cheerfully.

Well, tell me. What do you have there?

I'm on this question, - the devil Yegor spoke, - according to our charter, the entire shift in which the spy was caught - the angel is supposed to be destroyed.

Have you applied for a cleanup service? What is this change?

Shift B, 35 devils, and I haven't applied yet.
- Why?
- Elder devil Boris. You know what tension with the staff is now. All adult devils in the field, that is, on the ground, hunt for souls. And then a week ago, fifty devils of engineers were sent on a business trip to Moscow.

I know it,” Boris interrupted him. - Our devil Anatoly Sidorov needs them to complete the project to create an installation that kills human souls. Frames are not your concern.
Since when did you start worrying about the devils? Something you are darkening Yegorushka.

Boris got up, left the table, went up to Yegor and yelled at him:

Say what you think?

Damn Yegor cringed.

My nephew works on shift B.

Boris returned to the table, sat down on a chair.

You should have said so from the start. And then you're brainwashing me.

He poured vodka into a glass, drank and dragged on a cigarette.
Then he took another glass and a bottle from the desk drawer.

Come here, - Boris called, - take a chair and sit down.

The devil Yegor took a chair that stood to one side and went up to the table. Sitting down carefully.
Boris poured vodka into glasses. The devils clinked glasses and drank.

Well? Boris drawled.

He is still young, just a kid, - Yegor spoke. I didn't know and never heard of him. And then two days ago he comes and says that his mother sent him. “Go,” he says, “to your cousin Yegor and tell him to get you a job.”

Damn Yegor fell silent.

Well? – again held out Boris.

Only some he is not like everyone else, sloppy. On the very first day, the shift supervisor complained that he had almost put out the stove in which sinful souls are burned. "It's a pity - he says - them."

Yegor was silent.

Maybe he's not your nephew at all? Maybe another spy. Have you taken a horn analysis?

Have taken. But the result will be in a day. But now it doesn't matter who he is.

Boris opened a new bottle, spilled it, and they drank some more. And here the brains of the Elder Devil have earned.

Listen here, - he turned to Yegor. - On the other side, they found out what we are doing here besides performing our direct duties. About souls on parole, about soulless people.
If Satan finds out that the information has gone from us, you and I are both dead. I talked with Saint Peter and realized that this information would not go further than him. Soon the devil Anatoly will make an installation to remove souls from people, and if it starts to work, then the information will reach Christ and then to Himself.
Can you imagine what will happen? It will cover the whole project. This is what Satan needs. He definitely has some kind of option for this case. And what should we do? Satan hates people, Christ, Himself. He hates everyone.
Why should we hate them? What, do we live badly? And what will happen to us?

What are you getting at Boss? Yegor interrupted him.

And besides, Yegorushka, that you and I got caught. We are in a trap. Listen to me. Suspend parole for the time being. Second: Anatoly's trait must be eliminated before he starts his installation.
Without it, everything will stall and fall apart.

And how will we do it?

Someone must be sent to Moscow.

Your nephew. What do you think?

After a short pause, he replied:

Well, I do not know. Yes, and we have no other choice. Will he just make it?

He wants to live, he can do it. What's up with your parole souls?

One block is ready, today there will be a launch of a spacecraft from Earth with Glonass satellites. planned to send.

Here in this block and send your nephew to Earth. Go bring him to me and make a list of all the devils of shift B, I'll sign it. Then you hand it over to the cleaning department.

An hour later, the devil Yegor returned with his nephew.
It was a young unimpressive imp.
The elder devil Boris looked at him attentively.

Something I don't understand. Either I'm seeing double or are you some kind of double.

No. I'm not a double master Big Devil. My number is 017.

After the young devil 017 received the task, Boris said goodbye to him:

Avoid a direct meeting with the devil Anatoly ahead of time. He is highly educated and experienced like Satan himself. Something is wrong with you, he will immediately bite you. And yet, beware of redheads and bald people - they will deceive and rob.

When 017 left the office, the devil Yegor filed a list of devils from the station. Boris signed it.

As soon as the liquidation protocol is brought, I will also mark your nephew. Go, when you send, come back to me. Let me know how it went.

After launching the spacecraft from the Earth into the resulting tunnel, the mail and delivery service successfully sent down an information container with parole souls.
Damn Yegor returned to Boris's office.

Well, let's get on the road, - said Boris, pushing a glass of vodka to Yegor.

The devils drank.
And suddenly Yegor grabbed his throat, wheezed and fell to the floor.

Sorry brother, - Boris sighed, - nothing personal.

A small helicopter flew low over the forest. On board, in addition to the crew, there was a group of five people. Inveterate mushroom pickers got out into nature. Nothing that was a working day. It didn't bother them.
First Deputy Prime Minister of Russia Alexei Norkovich looked out the window.

There is a good clearing over there, let's go there, - he shouted to the pilot.

The pilot turned sharply to the left and the helicopter began to roll on its side.
The motor sneezed twice and stalled.

We're falling! the pilot yelled and pressed the emergency beacon button.

The helicopter flew in a curved arc for another fifty meters and fell like a stone into the forest.

After the arrival of the data container with parole of souls on the ground and its automatic unpacking, the young devil number 017 barely took his hooves away from the freed souls. After a short chase, they fell behind 017 and scattered into different sides in search of soulless people.
Having caught his breath, devil 017 went straight to Moscow to the Sklifosovsky medical center in building number 3 to ward number 6. There was only one patient in the ward. On the bed lay a mushroom picker - the loser Alexei Norkovich. He was in a coma. At his feet sat his devil. A little further away, two angels were waiting, they were supposed to take the soul of the dying man to court and put a mark in the personal book of the devil, confirming that the soul belongs to him. There was not long to wait.
The young devil 017 approached the patient.

Whats up? the devil Alexei asked.

Give me that soul.

For what reason. What, you can't grab a healthy one, kid? Weakling.

The patient's soul, small and weak, sat on a pillow next to his head and wept softly.

Game for the soul, - said 017.

The angels watched the devils with interest.
If the devil Alexey refuses to play, then they will definitely find out about it in the court of Devil's honor and it will be a great shame.
He thought a little.

One to three.

This meant that in case of a loss, the devil 017 would have to give three of his souls to the devil Alexei within a year.

I agree - answered 017 - the soul is a witness.

Damn Alexey took out a thin deck of cards. These were unusual cards. He fanned them out and turned them upside down. Four aces of spades and four tens of spades. 017 checked the shirts to see if they were marked.
Damn Alexei shuffled the deck and held out 017u. He pulled out a card.

Ace, I bank.

He took the cards from Alexei, shuffled them and handed them back. Alex moved.
017 shuffled again.

Soul, look. You are a witness, - he said to the weeping soul and will stretch out two cards from the deck to the devil Alexei.

Then 017 easily counted out two cards for himself.

Open up, he said.

Alexei opened his cards.

Twenty one. Point! he shouted.

017 opened his.

Two aces!

The devil Alex swore and left.

Well, don't cry, don't cry, - 017 turned to his soul, - I'll save you.
The angels, as if sensing some kind of change, also left.
Several minutes passed and Alexey Norkovich opened his eyes.
The patient recovered quickly. A week later he was visited by his friend Dmitry Poklad, Prime Minister of the Russian government. He wished Alexei a speedy recovery.
Two weeks later, Norkovich returned to work. After the next meeting of the government, Alexei approached Dmitry and asked him:

I heard that you were going to go to the Cathedral of Christ the Savior to Patriarch Kirill for a service. May I come with you?

Yes, you certainly may.

After the patriarch finished the service, Dmitry was going home. Norkovich said goodbye to him:

I'll be late. I want to talk to Cyril.

I understand, - said Dmitry, - after a miraculous salvation, I found faith in God.

Yes. You can say so.

Alexei quickly found a priest.

Vladyka, - he turned to Kirill, - I need to talk to you alone.

Let's go to my office.

Left alone, they started talking.

I heard about your miraculous healing. Doctors have abandoned you, but life takes its toll thanks to our Lord and holy prayer.

Thanks lord. I came to you for a completely different reason. What I am going to tell you now must remain in the strictest confidence, only between us. I am Jesus Christ in the form of this man. I spared his life in order to defeat Satan. Listen and don't interrupt. You will definitely believe me. I will help you with this.

Alexey Norkovich made a short pause and continued.

You have probably paid attention to what has been happening in recent years in the country and around the world. Loss of moral principles, decay of society, lawlessness.
All this happens because Satan came to earth in human form. And now he is in Russia. Here in Moscow. With the help of the latest technology, he learned to kill human souls, using the quantum radiation of an electronic station in Alaska and the Large Hadron Collider in France and Switzerland for this, violated the law of reincarnation of souls.

But how does he do it?

His numerous assistants install receiving antennas and electronic chips with amplifiers in the bodies of newly built Boeing and Airbus aircraft. Everything is made from the best signal conductor, pure gold.
Passengers who wear gold jewelry are the first victims of Satan. Quantum radiation burns out the souls of people, spraying them into nothing. All over the world there are fewer and fewer less people with souls.
We have almost lost North America and Western Europe. Russia's turn. Here in Moscow, Satan is setting up an installation with which he will not only kill souls. Women will start giving birth to soulless children. Killing souls, Satan creates biorobots. This is the end of human history. End of the Age of Man.

But how can a soul be saved? Patriarch Kirill asked.

Until the Moscow installation has started working, a silver cross consecrated with living water is enough. It will neutralize the quantum beam. But when the installation starts working, then Satan will loop the entire system through space satellites and nothing will help.
We must stop him. We need to destroy the installation.

Norkovich was silent.

You said that Satan is in human form. Who is he?

This is Anatoly Sidorov, director of the Nano Technologies corporation, - Alexei replied.

They don't call him the Devil for nothing. You can't deceive the people, - Cyril sighed. – How to stop him?

Your task, Lord, is to find plastic explosives and make a fuse for it. The fuse should be like this, - Alexei took out a piece of paper folded in half from the inside pocket of his jacket and handed it to the patriarch. Kirill took the sheet, unfolded it and looked at the sketch of the fuse.

So simple - he was surprised - water?

Yes, water is the source of life. Nothing should be metallic. The bomb will be made in the Vatican. I'll be back in two weeks.

This was the end of the meeting.

Two days later, Patriarch Kirill was already in Italy in the Vatican with Pope Francis.
Paying tribute to protocol and etiquette, they retired to one of the secret rooms of the palace. The conversation was long and very productive. After listening to the request of Cyril, Francis thought.

I agree with you, - he told him, - and I will help. For our part, we will also take the necessary measures. How long will you stay with us?

I wanted to visit Orthodox churches.

That's good, I think we'll make it. When everything is ready, we will send the Shroud of Turin to Russia, and we will put a bomb in it.

Saying goodbye to Patriarch Kirill, Francis summoned his assistant special assignments Vincenzo.

Can we make this in the shortest possible time? He handed him a piece of paper.

He looked.

Yes Papa. The fuse will be made by our specialists, and I will get the plastic one myself. We have someone to put pressure on.

Well, that's good, with God.

A call came to the cell phone of the leader of the Sicilian mafia, Giuseppe.

I'm listening to. Who is it?

My name won't tell you anything. We must meet.

Discuss your latest heroin deal.

Who are you?

I repeat, my name won't tell you anything.

Okay, come to my office. Do you know where?

An hour later, a man came to Giuseppe. It was Vincenzo from the Vatican.
With a diplomat in hand, he entered the office.

Who are you? Giuseppe asked.

Let's talk alone, - said Vincenzo.

He put the diplomat on the edge of the table, and he raised his hands up. One of the guards searched him.

Clean.

Everyone left the office. Giuseppe and Vincenzo were left alone.

Who are you? Giuseppe asked again.

I'm a worker for the Vatican, Vincenzo, but this must remain between us.

And what do you need a saint?

Five kilograms of plastic. Here - Vincenzo pointed to the diplomat - a deposit, half the amount. The rest after I receive the goods.

I don't work with terrorists.

I'm not a terrorist, I'm from the Inquisition. Your last heroin deal is your last deal. You made a mistake, Giuseppe.

Giuseppe's eyes widened.

How do you know?

We know everything. The world is not without good people.

When is it necessary?

I'll be back in two days.

Vincenzo turned and left the office. When the door closed behind him, Giuseppe grumbled angrily:

Fanatics...

Then he called Antonio, his faithful dog, my right hand in all dirty deeds.

We need to get five kilograms of plastite and quickly. Do we have any Americans?

There is. One colonel quartermaster works at the base. He's on our hook, lost at the casino.

Here, take the money and do it yourself. Nobody has to know.

Two days later, Vincenzo came to pick up the merchandise. Having taken the plastic, he gave the money.

I am always happy to help the holy throne. Can we be friends?

Satan is your friend, - answered Vincenzo and left.

Giuseppe summoned Antonio to him.

Where are the drugs?

In a bank cell.

Take everything and throw it into the sea.

I listen to the boss.

Before leaving Rome, Patriarch Cyril and Francis had a conversation.

Yes, Satan is taking over. Looks like he went all-in.

Tell Francis, they say you don't have one lung.

This is true. And what?

I asked Jesus how he thought to eliminate Satan, and he replied that Francis knew.

The pontiff sighed.

I think this is the only way.

In the morning the church is not crowded and quiet. Anna Ivanovna, a forty-year-old woman, stood in front of the icon of the Mother of God and prayed.

God help me. My son Olezhek got into a bad company, takes drugs. My strength is no more. Lord help, protect.

She once again crossed herself at the icon, bowed and, turning, went to the exit.
There was a table by the door. There is a poster on the wall above him.

“Dear parishioners who have children under 20 years old.
Take crosses to save the soul. Let them wear it without taking it off.

Silver crosses on silk threads were laid out on the table.
Anna Ivanovna turned and went up to the priest.

Father. May I have a cross?

Take. The order of the patriarch, to issue crosses to children for free. Soon we will change the gilded domes to silver ones.

Nearby stood a middle-aged man.
Anna Ivanovna returned to the table, took the cross, crossed herself and left the church.
The city was waking up. Passers-by scurried here and there. Cars ran through the streets.
Anna Ivanovna hurried home. As she approached the crosswalk, she stopped. Here a man caught up with her, who in the church listened to her conversation with the priest.

Well, you are a fool. Look.

And he opened his fist. In the palm of his hand lay several silver crosses.

Why do you need so many?

Selling.

He went across the road. Anna Ivanovna follows him.
And then the classic trap for pedestrians worked. The car in the front row braked and stopped. A jeep flew along the second row. The brakes screeched. The man crossing the road was taken aback. He jerked forward, then turned back. The jeep hit him. The man flew up, fell on the hood, and then on the pavement. Passers-by rushed to the victim.
Anna Ivanovna clutched her heart in fear.
She came home. The son did not sleep. He rummaged through the drawers of the chest of drawers, in the chiffonier.

What are you looking for?
- Give me money. I can't, it breaks everything.

Son, you have to stop. You will die.

Well, let! - the son shouted, - give me money.

Let's go to the doctor. He will help.

Nobody will help me. Give me money.

You sold the music center.

Mom give me money, I feel bad. How can you not understand.

Okay son, okay. Here, take a thousand, - she took out a banknote from her purse, - just put on a cross. They gave it to me in the church.

Why is he to me?

The mother handed the cross to her son. He looked, thought: - Silver, selling.

Then he put it on his neck under a T-shirt and left the apartment.
Anna Ivanovna went into the kitchen, sat down on a stool, and wept bitterly.
An hour later, having put herself in order, she went to the dacha where things were waiting for her.
In the evening she returned tired. She opened the apartment door and entered. It was quiet. She took off her shoes and went into the kitchen. There was a thousand dollar bill on the table. Anna Ivanovna was agitated. The phone rang in my son's room. She approached the door.

Hello.
- Wandered around the city.
- Gene. I won't come again. I finished.
- I found a job and will be recovering for my studies. Everything, come on. Do not call me more.

Anna Ivanovna went into her room. She took the icon of the Mother of God from the shelf. She sat down on the bed and pressed her to her heart.
Tears were running down my cheeks. Tears of little joy and great hope.

Henry Missinger came to St. Petersburg to the next economic forum.
He was an American citizen and an honored guest of the forum. Henry Missinger - Damn was the head of the American Sector in Hell. This is the only devil of all the leaders whose ward was still alive. And he was the only one of all the devils who knew that Anatoly Sidorov was Satan.
He came to St. Petersburg to meet with him in order to receive new orders. In between business discussions of the Russian economy, on the pretext of a trip to a restaurant for lunch, he got into Anatoly Sidorov's car.

Report, ordered Sidorov. “No one will overhear us here.

We're all set, Master. Our and European satellites are on standby.

Glonass satellites are also ready to receive and transmit a signal at the right time,” Sidorov added. - What else?

In the Russian sector, they stopped sending souls from parole to earth, continued Henry Missinger. “An angel spy was also caught there and killed. Probably St. Peter and Christ learned about souls with parole. In Russian churches, silver crosses are being distributed and the gilded domes of churches are being replaced with silver ones. Over the past week, the number of angels in the Moscow area has increased dramatically. The clashes of the devils with them became more frequent.

Henry was silent.

You see how good the combination is, you know what is happening in this and our worlds. You are the best.

Yes, we follow everyone here and there,” Henry boasted.

How did people know that silver helps to save the soul? Sidorov asked. And he answered himself:

This means that Christ came to earth in the form of a man. All my work, Henry, is not only aimed at creating a device for destroying the souls of people. My main goal is the soul of Christ himself. So he is on the ground and somewhere nearby. He came to stop me.
It remains only to find it and grab it. I will put it on gold, direct a quantum beam through the satellites into his soul and burn it with a quantum arc.
Humanity will lose its protector. Son of God. And I will build new world. I will become a god.

Henry listened to his master with his head down humbly. Sidorov was silent. After a short pause he continued.

Listen to orders. Bring the devil to Boris and order him on my behalf to send all the free devils to Moscow.
Order the devils to the leaders of friendly countries to send legions of their devils to Russia. Angels will fiercely defend their Christ. There will be a battle. And further. I sent a wagonload of gold to France. Manufacture and install receiving chips with microcircuits in cell phones, tablets, iPhones, smartphones, electronic games, computers, laptops, bank cards, passports. Let's kill souls.

This ended the meeting.

The next meeting of the government was coming to an end.

So, what questions have we not solved yet? Dmitry Poklad glanced around at his ministers.

Dmitry Ivanovich, - the minister of social services turned to him. development, - Tuva asks for money to complete the construction of three kindergartens, one hospital and to repair schools.

How?

70 million.

The Prime Minister looked at the Minister of Finance.

No money, he replied.

OK. We carry over to next year. Note in the protocol. We will return to this issue at the end of the year.

I also have a request from Tuva, - the Minister of Nature Protection entered into the conversation.

What else is there?

They are asking for money to maintain the conservation area of ​​the Amur tigers.

Why should they?

For the purchase of a new video surveillance system, for new off-road vehicles and for doubling the staff of hunters.

How?

100 million.

The prime minister thought. Everyone was waiting. After a long pause, he turned to the Minister of Finance.

Highlight. Take it off somewhere. Well, the meeting is over. Go work.

The office is empty. The prime minister and Aleksey Norkovich remained.

What did you want? Dmitry asked.

Listen Dim. I have long wanted to talk to you about the Nano Technologies corporation. Or rather, about Anatoly Sidorov.

Well, speak.

Do you know what he does? So much money and gold goes there. Like an abyss. What does he do?

A quantum computer, the prime minister replied. - If everything works out, if we get quantum technologies, then this will be a huge breakthrough. We are ahead of everyone.

None of the quantum technology. As far as I remember, it was never tested.

Well, what do you think he does?

He makes a plant that will be able to kill human souls on a massive scale.

Dmitry carefully looked at Alexei.

Are you kidding or serious?

Seriously.

Yes ... - Dmitry drawled, - after the accident, you changed a lot. You have something in your head. Don't hesitate to tell anyone else about this. Take a vacation, rest for at least a week.

I'll think about it, said Alexei. – Where are you now?

Home. And you?

I will go to Lokomotiv, we have a game with veterans today. Bye then.

Narkovitch got up and walked towards the exit.
In his free time, Alexey Norkovich liked to play football. That evening he arrived at the Lokomotiv stadium, where the football team of politicians and artists was supposed to play with veterans of national football.
During the game, Alexei felt unwell and was taken by an ambulance to the nearest hospital.
But in reality it was all planned ahead of time.
After the arrival of Patriarch Kirill from the Vatican, Alexey Norkovich met with him, and they discussed and planned all their further actions.
From the container with the Shroud of Turin, which had double walls, they removed the plastite and the fuse, then specialists were trained.
Norkovich was brought to the hospital and placed in a separate room.
Spent the night emergency operation removal of the left lung. A plastic bomb was placed in place of the lung required form with a quantum fuse attached to the collarbone and ribs. Then the scapula was closed and sewn up. The seam is big. Pictures of a patient who was no longer in this world, with a diagnosis of lung cancer, were included in the established medical history.
A team of three doctors did their job professionally. After the operation, the patient was placed in the intensive care unit.
After two hard days, Aleksey Norkovich felt a little better. A week later he was transferred to a separate room.
Dmitry Poklad visited his friend. His mood was not important, and after visiting Alexei it became even worse. Alexei again started talking about Anatoly Sidorov. That he must be stopped before it's too late.

As soon as Henry Missenger returned to America, the first thing he did was leave his ward and went straight to the Russian sector of Hell to Boris. Devil Henry entered the office, walked past the secretary and kicked open the door with a hoof, entered the office of the Senior Devil.
The devil Boris sat at the table and smoked "Belomor - Canal". The devil Henry took an empty chair, set it up and sat opposite Boris.

Are you all drinking?

Boris was silent.

The owner sent me. You are ordered to send all free devils to Moscow, to the Devil's dome, - continued Henry.

Boris smoked and was silent.

Why are you silent? Why did you destroy the entire shift of devils? And missed the spy. The owner has finished the installation of the quantum plant. He wants to lure Christ to earth and destroy him. In the meantime, the Boss is busy, I'm in charge here. I am over two thousand years old.

What are you twitching about? Bitch American! yelled the devil Boris. - What are you commanding here? I have the same status.

He grabbed a massive ashtray from the table and threw it at Henry's head.

Ding ... - a piece flew off Henry's horn.

Boris turned the table. The devils grappled in hand-to-hand combat. A secretary with a security guard came running to the roar. They twisted the devil Henry and dragged him out of the office.

The owner will return, he will show you! yelled Henry.

When it was all over, the devil Boris picked up a piece of Henry's horn from the floor. Looked at the world. Then he called the secretary.

Basil. Take this sample to the lab. Tell them to immediately do an analysis for everything that is possible. Urgently. And yet, announce the mobilization of the old devils. Send them to Moscow. Youth is not invited. Running.

The secretary hastened to carry out the task, and Boris began to restore order. Raised the table, chairs, ashtray.
He walked around the office from corner to corner and thought:

Looks like I've gone too far. This creature will snitch on the owner.

He went into the waiting room, opened the drawer of the secretary's desk. He took out a glass and an unopened bottle of vodka. He returned to his office, sat down at the table and uncorked the bottle. Two hours have passed. Secretary Vasily looked into the office.

Then the head of the laboratory Zaychak came.

Let him come in.

The head of the laboratory entered the office.

Greetings, Elder Devil.

Well, what did you bring?

I have three messages. Two of mine and one from Oversight.

What do they have?

A sinner escaped from deep Hell.
- How did you escape? Who?

Stalin. He carried stones across the pass. There, back under escort. The convoy devil periodically beat him with a whip. When dinner was brought to the devil, no one was found. No sinner, no devil.

What do you have?

First message. The nephew of the devil Yegor is not a devil at all. Horn implants.

It doesn't get any easier from time to time. And who is he? Angel?

No, not an angel. We cannot determine.

Second. Analysis of the horn sample showed that the age is more than two thousand years. In the early rings of the horn, dust was found characteristic of soils in the area of ​​the Dead Sea and the Temple Mount. I guess….

Stop - the devil Boris interrupted him. Keep your assumptions to yourself. Understood?

I ask again, do you understand?

OK. You work well. I praise.

Happy to try Boss.

Left alone, the devil Boris thought for a long time. Then he pulled the phone towards him, picked up the receiver and dialed the number.

It's good that I caught you, - said Boris. “I did an analysis of your horn here and something became clear to me.

What became clear to you?

The angels were knocked off their feet, looking for the devil Pontius Pilate, who handed over the son of God Christ to death two thousand years ago. Everyone was found and destroyed, but the devil of Pontius Pilate sank into the water. Are you our dear Henry?

The devil will not give up.

Rent Henry, Rent.

What do you need?

The owner has nothing bad about me. You will withdraw your candidacy for the election of the chairman of the twenty, - the devil Boris hung up on the phone.

He went to the reception.

Basil, have you heard? The soul of your ward's father has escaped. There has never been such a thing that the devil would capture the soul. Now comes the fun. Close the office. We're going to a restaurant.

They went out into the street. Near the office stood Boris' chaise drawn by two sinners.

Boss - Vasily turned to Boris - why are you all driving a deuce? Others have threes and fours.

I want to get Misha. You send a request to the office of St. Peter. As soon as he turns up with them, let them not drag out the court.

They sat down in the chaise.

Let me run.

The devil Boris took the reins in one hand and the whip in the other.

Let's go.

The sinners slowly set off along the pavement. Boris whipped one, then the second.

Live Leonid, move Nikita.

The head of the English sector in hell Senior devil Churchill was talking on the phone with his German colleague the devil Adolf.

Adolf. What does your former ward do for you?

He has a day off today. In the morning, a walk through the swamp, where evil herons will chase him and peck at him. And after lunch, skiing from the salt slides. Why are you asking about him?

The great march to the East begins. Does he have a desire to remember the past? He could lead the legions of our devils. Are you directing yours?

No. German devils will not participate. We've had enough of the past. And my ward at the word Russia starts hysterical. To me, this is an adventure. In addition, they say that Stalin escaped from hell. So good luck to you, and we will look from the side.

Yes, I'm not happy about it either. But you know, the Master's order.

That was the end of their conversation. The devil Churchill put down the phone. He lit a new cigar and called his secretary.

Margaret, he spoke, send an order to the commanders of the legions. Immediate performance. We need to help our Russian devils. They began to have serious clashes with the angels. Together with the American and French devils, it is necessary to occupy Russia in the coming days.

It will be done, sir devil, - the devil Margaret answered and proceeded to complete the task.

The damn car was spinning. Events developed rapidly. Legions of English and French devils passed through the countries of Europe to the borders of Russia. Here they stopped to regroup and prepare for the attack. At the border they were met by Russian teams of angels. The angels were joined by their brethren from other countries. A big war was coming. It was very difficult for the angels. They also had to fight off their Russian devils.
Devils who came from England and from France, where there is almost no human souls, began to take them away from local devils from Ukraine and Belarus. The situation was heating up. Clashes began between the devils.
And at that moment, the devil with a smoking pipe showed up and announced that he was Stalin. A core of devils dissatisfied with the new order immediately formed around him.
Damn Stalin issued an order and sent it with messengers around the world. The order read:

"Damn brothers! At this hour, when the capital of Russia, Moscow, is captured by Satan, disorder, chaos reigns throughout the country. Legions of invaders stand on our borders. I order! To all the devils within the former Union stop attacking the angels and direct their anger towards the alien devils. Satan's idea to destroy all human souls threatens the devils with unemployment and civil strife. Human souls are our bread. We will not give a single soul to Satan for destruction. Hit and stab the invaders where you are. Let's get our order. Anyone who disobeys my order, I will destroy. I'll rot in the camps."

And this is where it all exploded. The devil went to hell. Belarusian and Ukrainian devils launched a guerrilla war against the invaders.
The Turkish devils did not allow the Americans to pass through their territory, saying that they needed to think. American devils tried to pass through Iran, but were rebuffed. On the Far East Japanese and Korean devils attacked the American ones.

The head of the corporation "Nano Technologies" Anatoly Sidorov, aka Satan, was sitting in his office at his desk.
Everything went according to plan. The station in Alaska was working properly, the devils from the Large Hadron Collider were waiting for the signal to launch. All space satellites worked normally.

Where are you Christ? Where? - he thought, - I smell something nearby. What are you thinking?.

Knocking on the door, his assistant entered.

I'm on the gold account, master.

Yes, thanks for reminding me.

Anatoly picked up the phone for direct communication with the president.

Hello mister president.

What do you want?

I'm talking about gold. I need one and a half tons for technical development.

Anatoly. Our entire gold mining industry only works for you. When will the results be?

Soon, soon already.

For the last time I give.

Thank you Mr President. You are my soulless.

What are you talking about?

Yes, by the way, I had to. Goodbye.

At night, he was awakened by a call from America from Henry Missinger.

Well, what do you have?

Our specialists from the NSA have read Dmitry Poklad's electronic diary. Listen:

“I feel very sorry for my friend. He has some kind of obsession. He tells me that Anatoly Sidorov must be stopped before it's too late, that he is building a plant for the mass destruction of human souls. He has something in his head. I'm really sorry".

Henry stopped dictating.

After a short silence, Anatoly Sidorov said:

It's him. Christ. Listen Henry. He'll be in my hands in at least three hours. Keep in touch with me from now on. Yes, check out what's going on with us.

Despite the deep night, Sidorov raised his guards, called a car and went to Dmitry Poklad.

While the prime minister was being awakened, he went into his office. He sat down in a chair and waited. Ten minutes later, the Prime Minister entered the office, sleepy, not happy.

What are you, Anatoly, what happened?

There is a conversation for you.

Can't it be during the day?

It is forbidden. The conversation is urgent.

Speak.

Dima. You wrote in your electronic diary about your friend. Who is he and where is he now?

How did you know?

Doesn't matter. Who is he and where?

Dmitry thought.

Speak, countryman.

Will you help me become the next president?

What are you talking about? Do you feel bad in the prime minister's chair?

Yes, he presses constantly, presses.

It is necessary to work, and not sit on the Internet all the time. Well, who is he?

Lyosha Norkovich. He is in the hospital now. After operation. In the fourth city.

That's good.

Sidorov took out a cell phone from his jacket pocket and called.

Quickly to city hospital number four, take Aleksey Norkovich there and come to our Center.

He put away the phone. He got up from his chair, took out his wallet, pulled out 1 dollar from it and threw it on Dmitry's lap.

Here.

Then he turned and walked to the exit with the words:

Two thousand years have passed, nothing has changed. Do you hear Judas, - he raised his face up, - you sold him again.

It was getting light. Anatoly Sidorov's car was driving along the highway. An old man walked along the road ahead.

Well, stop it, - he ordered the driver.

The car stopped. Sidorov opened the back door.

Where are you heading? St. Peter. Sit down, we'll take you.

The old man sat down. The car started moving.

I am not Peter. I'm going to the next village to visit a relative.

Don't pretend, I recognized you right away. Where is your teacher? Where is Christ?

What are you talking about, I don't understand.

You understand everything. Your business is bad. I have Christ. You will lose it soon. I'm going to kill him.

The old man didn't answer.

Stop the car,” he said, “I'll get out.

What, arrived already?

It stinks in here. You need to wash your hooves.

The car stopped. Two guards dragged my grandfather out and threw him to the side of the road.

In half an hour Saint Peter was already in his office. He called the apostle Andrew.

I found Satan. This is Anatoly Sidorov. Jesus is in captivity. Under the dome. Collect urgently all the angels, shoot from the northern borders. Head to Moscow. It is necessary to beat off the sky above the dome and block it from above in order to weaken the effect of the quantum signal from the satellites. Otherwise, Christ will perish. Raise everyone. I'll be there soon too.

Here he was interrupted by the secretary who entered the office:

St. Peter. Here the parliamentarian from the devils. He says it's very important and urgent.

- ... Give orders and wait by the phone. I'll call you back in five minutes, - finished the conversation with Andrei Peter.

Let him in, he said to the secretary.

The devil appeared at the door. He went to the table, took out a smoking pipe and matches from his jacket pocket. He lit his pipe.

We don't smoke.

Be patient, the devil replied.

What did you complain about?

Peter, I fully own all the information and no less than you are interested in putting Satan in his place. He brought the invaders to Russia and he must be stopped. Stop this fratricidal war between devils. And you need to save your Christ before it's too late. The account goes on for several hours.

How can you help us? Saint Peter asked.

The dome of Satan is guarded by his guard. These are several thousand selected, well-fed and well-armed devils.
You will lay many thousands of your angels before you clear the sky above the dome and you may not have time

What do you suggest?

In the Russian sector there are camps in which you contain stumbled sinful angels. Place them under my command. I will create penal battalions of them. Battalions of black angels. They will sweep away the guards of Satan. Then do with them what you want.

Peter thought for a moment and said:

Ok, I agree. Their further fate will depend on how they show themselves in the battle for Moscow.

Saint Peter called the Apostle Andrew back.

I'm sending one hell to you. He will explain everything to you. We'll issue an order later. Meet me over Moscow.

Fallen angels lined up. There was an ominous silence. The devil addressed them:

Black Angels! You are all sinners and criminals just like me. But you have a chance to wash away your crimes with blood. All, without exception, are enrolled in penal battalions and sent to liberate Moscow from the guard units of Satan.
Cowards and deserters will be destroyed on the spot.

Battalions were quickly formed and sent into the thick of the battle, to the Devil's Dome. There were angels who refused. They were here destroyed by the devils from the barrage detachments.

Satan Anatoly Sidorov arrived at his work. In the scientific center of Nano technologies, popularly nicknamed the devil's nest.
He went to his office and called his first assistant.

Where is Alexey Norkovich?

Under guard in the office of the chief of security.

Have you checked it? What about him?

According to the hospital card, lung surgery. Crayfish. It's too late. Cut, looked at and sewed back.

Did you check for a bomb?

Checked clean.

Bring him here.

I listen to the owner.

A few minutes later, Norkovich was brought into the office. He was wearing a long hospital gown white color and barefoot.
As soon as Anatoly saw him, all doubts disappeared from him. It was Jesus Christ.

Well, that's where we met. I think for the last time.

Christ was silent.
Satan got up from the table and at that time came a video call from the president.

Anatoly, Dmitry Poklad called me and said that you had taken Aleksey Norkovich from the hospital. What for? He worries about him.

Good morning mister president. I took him to find out what he has against me.

Where is he?

Here in the office.

Let him come to the video camera. I'll talk to him.

The guards took Norkovich by the arms and brought the video camera into the coverage area.

Alexei. I will listen to you. What did you not share with Anatoly? What happened to you? the President asked.

I am Jesus Christ - the king of human souls. And Sidorov Satan incarnate. I've come to stop him because he's building a quantum machine capable of killing people's souls.

How is it to kill souls? Is it possible? the President asked.

Maybe. Satan has been doing this for a long time. With the help of quantum radiation from an electronic station in Alaska, more than 80% of souls were destroyed through electronic media in North America, in Western Europe more than 60%. With the commissioning of the Large Hadron Collider and the quantum facility in Moscow, the mass annihilation of souls around the world will begin.

And how many souls have already been destroyed in Russia,” the President interrupted him.

More than 10%.

And what threatens the loss of a soul for a person?

At first, a person feels some relief, even euphoria. The line between worldviews, the line between good and evil is being erased. The sense of responsibility disappears. Man becomes a biomachine. He needs money to get power and power to get money. He gets into a vicious circle. Then comes the lingering feeling that something is missing. Feeling of constant anxiety and loneliness in this world. A person thinks that his soul hurts and he goes to a doctor, to a psychologist. Visits churches and temples. But nothing helps, because he has no soul. He lost her.

Christ was silent.

Can you bring back a lost soul? the president asked.

And you bring back yesterday.

The President thought for a moment, and then turned to Sidorov:

Call an ambulance immediately and take him to the doctors. He's also sick.

I'll do it now," he replied.

You're wrong, Pilate! Christ shouted.

I am not Pilate. I am Putin.

And the president passed out.

Well, you see, Jesus, how much time has passed, nothing has changed, - said Satan, - and you are trying for them.

Are we all set? Satan turned to his assistant.

Everything but the golden crown to regulate the strength of the quantum signal.

Why?

She was brought from the Institute of Radio Electronics last night and left in the lobby in a box, and in the morning she was not there.

Where's she?! yelled Satan.

We interrogated the night shift. They confessed that they let some homeless boy spend the night to spend the night. He probably stole it.

Ah, Russia...! groaned Satan. “Lucky you, Christ, that your crown was stolen. I wanted to torment. But don't worry, you'll die immediately.

Master, call the Minister of the Interior. They will quickly find, - advised the assistant.

Just then the phone rang. Sidorov picked up the receiver and heard the voice of Interior Minister Koltsov.

Oh, light in sight, - said Anatoly.

Why did your people kidnap a man from the hospital at night? Koltsov asked.

They weren't kidnapped, they were taken away. The President and the Prime Minister are in the know. I have Koltsov's business for you.

Homeless boys stole a valuable device of national importance from us, it contains 1 kilogram of gold. Send your people.

I won't send anyone to you. Write an application in the usual way.

I'll complain to the premier.

Complain to whoever you want. And speaking of gold. I gave the command to detain a carload of gold at the border. When do you get laid? Everything is rushing and rushing out of the country, - said Koltsov.

This is gold under the Skolkovo program, you will be responsible for this, ”Sidorov said irritably and hung up.

Maybe call the president? the assistant advised.

The president is already aware. Why do you think he's so bold? Now wait for the mask show.

This is where Henry Missinger called on his cell.

Master, he reported, we have problems. We must hurry. The situation has changed dramatically. Damn Stalin formed penal battalions from sinful angels and threw them against your guard units. Black angels fight like hell. The Guard is taking heavy losses. If it goes on like this, they will be able to capture the entire sky above the Dome and create a multi-layered blockade. The quantum beam will lose power.

And where the hell from "ER"? Satan interrupted him.
- The European reserve is completely destroyed in Belarus. - I got it. Bring the station and the Hadron Collider to full power and send a signal in half an hour. Everything. The countdown has begun.

Satan got up from the table. He pointed his finger at Christ.

Lead him under the dome.

One of the guards approached the video equipment, disconnected the thick cord, folded it in half, walked up to Christ, swung and hit him hard on the back.

Well, go. The king of cattle, - pushed him. – Went!

Satan turned to his helper:

Close the gates to the Center. No one is allowed in or out. If necessary, use weapons.

I listen to the owner.

Did you come from TV?

The film crew arrived, but the host did not. Requested a lot.

Okay, I'll lead myself. Gather all personnel under the dome.

And over Moscow at that time, a battle that had not been seen until now and was not visible to people flared up. Thousands of devils and angels came together in mortal combat. Forces of good and evil. They stabbed, cut and strangled each other. People were losing electronic devices. Nobody knew what was happening. Only very small children, who did not yet know how to speak, cried and did not go out into the street. They saw how white and black angels, terrible devils fell to the ground and died, dissolving in a gray fog. Children hid in horror under tables and in dark corners. They sat there with their eyes closed and their hands over their ears.

Jesus was led down a long corridor scientific center Nano technologies. The cord-wielding guard periodically hit him on the back. Jesus' stitches had parted and his white shirt was slowly soaking with blood.
People poured out of all the offices and laboratories. Many of them filmed everything that happened on the cameras of cell phones, smartphones, iPhones and uploaded the video to the Internet.
He was led into a huge hall with a sliding dome. In the center was a quantum installation. On a golden circle with a diameter of 10 meters and a height of 1 meter lay a large golden cross.
The guards lifted Christ to the circle, led him and put him on the cross. Gold braces clicked on arms and legs.
Satan entered the room. He was dressed in a long black shroud. A film crew from television was filming, the program was broadcast on all channels.
The chief designer explained to Satan:

Master, here are three signal lights. Green, yellow and red. When green is on, the level of the quantum beam is low, yellow is medium, red is maximum, dangerous.
Satan climbed the circle and approached the cross.

Get started! he ordered.

The servos quietly began to work, and the cross with Christ began to slowly rise. The doors of the dome over the hall began to diverge, revealing a gloomy sky over the Devil's nest. Satan raised the microphone to his lips.

Lord! My children. Today you are present at the second and last coming of your god Jesus Christ. For in a few minutes he will be executed by me, the Lord of darkness - Satan. Thanks to recent advances modern science and technology made it possible. The era of the Kingdom of God and the Human Soul is ending. A new era begins. The era of soulless people without ethical standards and all morality. The era of biorobots. People! I will free you from your souls. They prevent you from living the way you want. Free and happy. There will be no more Jesus Christ, the son of God. Protector of souls. There will be no more human souls. We will build a new world.

The green lamp came on. Satan walked up to the cross, raised his head.

You see, Christ, what a cross I have prepared for you - a golden one. And no nails. Not like people. Soon you will perish and never rise again. I won. What will you say in your final hour?

Christ answered him:

You will spend the next thousand years in chains at the bottom of hell.

Bright flashes ran across the golden cross.

Master, Satan's helper shouted, go away, it's dangerous.

The yellow warning light came on. Satan looked into the eyes of Christ.
And at that moment, a quantum fuse went off in the Savior's chest. The basis of life - water gave impetus to the beginning of the destruction of the material.
There was a powerful explosion. The dome above the hall rose for a moment, and then collapsed down, destroying everything in its path.
Everything was over.

An American submarine was stationed at a military base in Sicily.
The captain of the submarine, John Moody, sat at the table in his cabin and looked at the photo, which showed his wife with two children. There was a knock on the door.

Sign in.

Mr. Captain, a telephone message from NATO Headquarters in Europe, - the second assistant to the captain reported as he entered.

What's there?

Only two words. "The sky is clear".

The captain winced.

Combat alert, urgently go to sea.

But half the crew is on leave.

Fulfill!

When the assistant left, the captain opened the safe, took out a pistol from there, put it in a combat position, then hid it under his shirt in his belt. He took a photo from the table, kissed it, put it down and left the cabin.
Half an hour later, the submarine went out to sea. Captain John Moody with a second officer were at the control panel. John pulled a flash drive from his shirt pocket and inserted it into the receiver of the electronic unit. A diagram flashed on the large display. He punched in the codes on the keyboard and gave the command:

Six missiles at the target in a checkerboard pattern, launch.

John turned the key and pressed the red button. The countdown has begun.

The assistant looked at the display, then at the captain.

What are you doing? he shouted. - This is Switzerland. Large Hadron Collider, and the sixth with a nuclear warhead.

Yes, that's her, Switzerland is a financial prostitute.

The assistant rushed to the console. John shot him.
Missiles with a small interval went to the target. The last one left.

For preservation, John said.

Then he put the gun to his temple.

God bless America, - he said and fired.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the planet, the head of the US Air Force airbase raised a B-52 bomber into the sky and struck an electronic station in Alaska, destroying it.
It was the answer of the Vatican, the answer of the Holy Inquisition.

That's all. It seems that no one has been forgotten. People! Take care of your souls. Sell ​​your gold for scrap. Save yourself!

On the street of the night city were two drunken and very similar to the devils homeless. They sang a song:

Christ asked: Who are you? - We gouging from Russia.