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The loss of a loved one is a great grief for any person. In such a life situation, he needs the sympathy and help of relatives, friends and just acquaintances.

Therefore, it is important not to remain indifferent and support people in connection with the death of their relatives so that they do not feel lonely.

The proposed material discusses how to properly express condolences to relatives, friends, colleagues, acquaintances in the event of the loss of relatives.

The interpretation of the word "condolence" is given in many dictionaries. They call sincere empathy for the grief of a person, expressed by others.

If we consider the meaning of the word, then this does not speak of the joint experience of the disease, but expresses the sharing of misfortune with another in order to reduce the feeling of pain.

Condolence shows that those nearby do not remain indifferent and jointly experience misfortune.

How to express to family and friends?

It should be borne in mind that the loss of loved ones causes an aggravation of feelings, so such people will always feel insufficiently sincerely spoken words.

When dealing with words of consolation, you need to be tactful and correct so as not to hurt a person even more.

Condolence is expressed in various forms if the deceased:

Grandmother, grandfather, distant relative.
Mother father.
Sister brother.
Daughter son.
Husband wife.
Friend, girlfriend.
Colleague.

When addressing the relatives and friends of the deceased, do not forget how much he meant to them, how great the loss is.

If words of comfort are spoken orally in a personal appeal, follow these rules:

Be gentle with short sentences, don't turn your sympathy into a long speech.
It is recommended to prepare in advance, rehearse what was said, think in advance how to say it correctly.
Imagine the deceased - the phrases will take on a personal, not abstract character.
Recall funny situations related to the deceased, cheer up the mourners, evoking positive emotions.
Avoid embarrassment, keep natural, do not be shy in expressing feelings.
Words can replace just a friendly hug, touch, warmth is confirmed by action.
Don't forget to offer support to the personally grieving family - help with registration, fundraising, etc.

Mistakes in behavior will exacerbate grief. The following is not allowed:

Calls to calm down - speaks of a lack of understanding of the loss suffered.m
To inspire a person to forget about this death, convincing him of the need to look for the positive.
Talk badly about the dead.
Condescending statements about similar grief with other people, such a tragedy is experienced individually.
To say that many have it harder.
Use hackneyed banal phrases that do not reflect personal opinion.

If you cannot find the right words, it is better to remain silent than to admit tactlessness. Do not force the mourner to answer, in deep grief there are no answers.

When expressing sympathy for Muslims, Jews, Orthodox, Catholics, people of other faiths, consider the religion and nationality of the mourner so as not to unknowingly offend the person.

Do not try to speak in Kazakh, in English, in another language with an insufficient level of preparation: you can distort the meaning of a phrase that is not spoken decently enough due to errors in pronunciation, according to the meaning.

What words to choose for colleagues and friends?

We are not always close with colleagues, but in a situation with the death of loved ones, one cannot remain indifferent.

Even if you have not communicated with a person, you cannot difficult situation pass indifferently, simply nodding in greeting. With such difficulties in life, the support of the team is important.

But do not bother with excessive attention. It is enough to say sincere words or just give a friendly hug to a colleague.

If a similar misfortune happened to a friend, all support is needed - this is how it manifests itself real friendship. Offer financial and organizational support.

Do not step aside, even if they do not make a request - a friend may simply be out of his mind, such an event for anyone is something transcendent, beyond comprehension.

Do not leave a friend alone with grief, talk less and do more, this will determine a lot.

condolences in prose

When addressing the mourners, use prose phrases without resorting to the newfangled condolences in verse.

It looks unnatural and pompous, testifies to your insincerity and desire to beautifully pronounce other people's phrases without expressing personal sympathy.

If it is not possible to apply in person, please call the text of condolences can be sent via SMS, telegram, message on social networks.

Here are some examples of phrases:

I will never forget him, he did a lot for me.
Hold on, we will support you. Everything will be OK.
I remember he said: do not lose heart in any situation. He will stay with us.
We will pray for him. You will not be alone, we are close by.

Do not forget: any phrases written on paper, even the most sincere ones, will not replace live participation. Find time to help in a difficult situation.

Condolence is appropriate after the death of a loved one and the anniversary of a mournful event. Do not forget about the dates of death of close acquaintances, friends, relatives, these days help will not be superfluous.

Examples of written text

When addressing words of consolation, one should consider in connection with whose death they are pronounced.

The table shows examples of various condolence phrases brought in writing on the death of relatives and friends:

It is difficult to speak in such a situation, but even if you do not know the mourner, or the deceased is unpleasant to you, you cannot remain indifferent.

Maybe your sympathy will lessen the pain of loss.

You can't prepare for death. Each person faced the loss of loved ones, loved ones, so many are familiar with the pain of loss.

But often we do not know how to calm down, support the grieving, how to express condolences in connection with the death of his loved ones, relatives.

note! Offering condolences to a grieving person is a must. This is a tribute.

But it is worth remembering that people after the death of loved ones are in a stressful, shock state. Words of condolence on the occasion of death are chosen carefully, carefully.

Examples of condolences on the occasion of death in your own words to the relatives of the deceased:

“The event shocked me. It is difficult to accept and reconcile.
"Let me share the pain of loss with you."
"The news of his death was a terrible blow."
"I sympathize with your pain."
"We empathize with your loss."
"I offer my condolences."
“I was shocked by his death. I will pray for his soul."
"The deceased meant a lot to us, it's a pity that he left us."
"Grief cannot be expressed in words, but you can always count on our support in difficult times."
"We mourn with you."

Sometimes it's better to express grief briefly.

Short and sincere words of sympathy:

"Hold on."
"Be strong."
"I'm sorry".
"My condolences".
"Sorry".
"It's a heavy loss."

If a grieving person who deeply believes in God, then they say such words of grief:

"The Kingdom of heaven".
"Rest in peace".
"Lord, rest with the Saints!"
"The world is bright to his ashes."
"Rest in the Kingdom of Heaven."

Table: rules for presenting words of condolence

What not to say

Everyone wants to support the grieving. But there are a number of words and expressions that are not appropriate at a funeral. Expressions can cause anger, aggression, resentment.

What not to do:

Comfort the future. When a baby dies, do not say "you are still young, give birth again." It's tactless.
It is difficult for parents to accept the loss of their own child, because they rejoiced at him, dreamed of the future.
The words “do not worry, you are young, you are still getting married” sound like “saying goodbye to your beloved.” It's cruel. For people who have lost children, spouses, parents at the time of their funeral, there is no future.
They are not ready to think about it. Their pain at the moment of loss is strong and painful.
Look for the extreme. If there is a culprit in death, do not remind about it. It is forbidden to say what would have happened if they had acted differently. It is not recommended to blame the deceased.
Examples: “it’s his own fault, he drank a lot of alcohol”, “this is his punishment for his sins.” Do not defame the memory of the deceased, because it is not in vain that they say that only good things should be said about the dead.
Asking you to stop crying. The mourner should mourn the dead and calm the soul.

Forbidden phrases:

« Death has taken its toll, do not shed tears". A person in the phase of acute shock does not finally understand what happened, that his close and dear one has passed away forever. Such words sound cruel.
« Don't worry, everything will be fine- sounds like a fairy tale or a cruel mockery. A person is not ready to accept such a statement, he does not believe that the pain will let him go and life will get better.
« Time cures". Not even time can heal spiritual wounds. The pain of loss will always be there. Any person who has experienced death will confirm this.
« So he was exhausted, he is fine there". If the deceased was very ill, then words are unlikely to calm the mourner.
He has one desire - to see a loved one nearby, and not to think that he is well in heaven.
« Think about it, it’s even worse for others, at least you have relatives left". Don't use comparisons. Respect the person's pain.
« I understand how it hurts" is a common and tactless phrase. Understanding a mourner is difficult.

Never discount the loss with the words “it’s good that you didn’t get hurt”, “think about the children, parents”, etc.

For those who mourn, death is a shock in life. He is not ready to look for positive moments in the loss of loved ones.

Important! It is worth remembering that condolences are offered from the heart. But this does not mean that you are allowed to say everything that comes to mind.

Grieving people do not perceive reality well, their subconscious is clouded with grief and resentment, so you should not provoke a person.

During the shock phase, one should not be interested in the details of the death of the deceased.

condolences in writing

Don't be sorry:

In verse.
By SMS.

This is neglect. Funerals are no place for poetry, and texting should be replaced with a phone call. If it is not possible to call, then you can express condolences in writing.

Sample text:

« We deeply mourn the death of the deceased.. He was an amazing, kind and well-mannered person, surprising with his joy and spontaneity.
It is difficult to write, the hand does not hold the pen from grief, but still it is necessary. We are sorry that it happened, but we are happy that fate brought us together with such amazing person. Peace be upon him on earth and in heaven."
« The news of the loss shocked my mind. I convey my condolences and express deep respect to the deceased.”
« It is difficult to find words when a storm rages in the soul and the bitterness of loss. Can't believe this happened. Our condolences. We pray for him."

Choose sensitive phrases that do not go beyond morality. In the text, you need to briefly acknowledge the loss, support the relatives of the deceased.

When writing a letter to relatives, describe the memories associated with it. When writing a text to a colleague, remember his business, personal qualities.

Useful video

How to express condolences on death:

relatives

Maria Andreevna, please accept our condolences. Roman was a very dear and close person to us. It's hard to believe what happened. We share your loss and mourn with you. Tell me how can we help?
Pyotr Ivanovich, Tamara Igorevna, we sympathize with you. This sad news shocked us. Nikolai was the soul of our team, one of the best. Please accept help.
Irina Petrovna, Alexander Ivanovich, Oleg, condolences. Vasily Alexandrovich was bright and sincere person He supported me more than once in word and deed. For me, this is an irreparable loss. I pray for the repose of the soul of Vasily Alexandrovich with you. Let me be there and share the sad chores in these difficult days. How can I help?

close

I sympathize with you, Andrei, Olga. What happened seems unthinkable, impossible. We are close I was friends with Larisa, and it will be hard for me to come to terms with this unfair loss. Larisa was not just a spiritual friend for me - a kindred person. Tell me, how can I be useful these days?
Please accept our condolences. For us, the departure of Igor Nikolayevich is also a huge loss. We will always remember Igor Nikolaevich as a bright and sincere person. We grieve and pray for the repose of his soul. Let me be with you in these sad days. Ready to provide any assistance.
Elena Petrovna, let me share the burden of your loss and help organize the funeral. The fact that Alexander left so suddenly is very difficult news, in which the mind refuses to believe. Sasha and I are school friends. He was a kind person, a wonderful friend and class leader. It is only thanks to Sasha that we, classmates, have not lost each other over the past years. We grieve with you.

family

Timofey Ilyich, Anna Mikhailovna, I sincerely sympathize with you. For me, the death of Mary is also an unbearable grief. Masha valued her family very much. Yes, and for me your home has always been home. Let me still visit you. How can I help you?
Nikolai Ivanovich, Elena Alexandrovna, condolences to your trouble. Unfortunately, we did not know you during Alexander's lifetime. He spoke of you so warmly and lovingly, he was proud that he had such wonderful parents. Alexander will forever remain in my memory as a true friend and an incredibly positive person. Can't believe he's gone. Let me help with the funeral.
We understand that there are no words that could console you today, Marina Vladimirovna. We are colleagues and subordinates of Timur Andreevich. Your husband was a bright man, a wise mentor, a fair leader, he supported and helped in everything ... It will not be easy for us to come to terms with the death of Timur Andreevich. Let me share your grief, help and be with you in these difficult days.

What words to express condolences in prose

How to Express Condolences to a Mother

Dear Anna Fedorovna, I sincerely sympathize with your grief. For me, your daughter was more than just a friend - a family and close person. The memory of Lyudmila in my heart forever. Let me be with you in these difficult days.
Irina Ivanovna, please accept our condolences. It is impossible to believe and reconcile, it hurts to talk ... Bright memory Andrew. You can always count on our help.
Maria Alexandrovna, dear, condolences with all my heart. Your son was a reliable friend and sincere person. I understand: any words today will not lessen your grief. Let me share with you the bitterness of loss, to be near. Ready to provide any help.

How to express condolences to a friend

Nadyusha, how painful and bitter - not to express. Your mother was also close to me. Brace yourself, my dear. And just know that I'm always there.
I grieve and cry with you, Anechka. Such unexpected and terrible news ... Lidia Petrovna was an unusually sincere and loving woman. How impossible it is to speak bitterly about your mother in the past tense ... Let me share grief with you and help.
Condolences, dear. For me, the death of Petr Andreevich is also a heavy loss. Your dad was a great soul man. I will always remember him with gratitude. Ready to help in everything.

How to express condolences to a colleague

Cyril, please accept my sincere condolences. I know that the departure of my mother is the most bitter loss. And any words here are powerless. Blessed memory of Tatyana Ivanovna. Be strong.
Anton, condolences. We understand how hard you are going through the death of your brother. Please accept our help.
Irina, we sincerely share your grief, for you this is a very heavy loss. We remember how cordially your husband received us as a guest ... We grieve with you. We are ready to help with the organization of the funeral and memorial dinner.

How to express condolences in writing

Dear Antonina Vasilievna! I deeply regret and mourn the passing of your mother. Irina Semyonovna was an amazingly benevolent, sympathetic and wise woman. It is bitter to say “was” ... I think many will remember your mother with warmth and gratitude. Ready to help with the funeral. Please write what I can do to help.
Dear Andrei Ivanovich! All of us, employees of Garant LLC, sincerely condole with you. Blessed memory to your father Ivan Ivanovich. Fortress of spirit to you and your family. We will forever remember our Ivan Ivanovich as a true master of his craft, a true professional, a sensitive, responsive, great soul person.
Our condolences, dear Alexandra Petrovna and Valery Vasilievich! Coming to terms with Andrei's death will not be easy for all of us. He was always open, honest, very positive person. He helped many of us in difficult life ups and downs. We will all remember your son lightly and with gratitude. Ready to offer any help.

How to express condolences in SMS

Alexander, shocked by the bitter news. Be strong. We will leave for you immediately.
Dear Lydia Andreevna, please accept my condolences. We cry and mourn with you. Tomorrow we will be with you.
Tatyana, Igor, what sad news... I sympathize with all my heart. Unfortunately, I will not be able to be with you in these mournful days, my mother is seriously ill. Brace yourself, dear ones.

Condolence verse

Muslims, like people of other faiths, feel pain, bitterness, sadness and also cry, losing dear and close people. However, they have a slightly different worldview, a different attitude to life and death, different traditions and customs. Sorrowful emotions in Muslim world not to be expressed openly. So, the words of condolence sound differently.

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100 examples of condolences on death

How to Express Condolences on a Death relatives and friends of the deceased? Mourning words of sorrow and support in difficult times. Sincere words of condolences on death - briefly.

Funeral words of grief for the deceased

Condolences are mourning words of sorrow who express sympathy for death. Sincere condolences provide for the format of a personal, personal appeal - verbal or text.

As part of or public condolence is also appropriate, but should be succinctly. In an expression of sympathy from a believer, you can add: "We pray for ___". Read more about the rules of condolences on the Epitaph.ru website.

Etiquette condolences from muslims is distinguished by a fatal attitude towards death and acceptance of loss, as well as clear requirements for rituals, clothing, behavior, symbols, gestures.

Condolence Examples

Universal Short Words of Sorrow

In the case when the words of condolence are pronounced after the burial or on the day of the funeral, then you can (but not necessarily) add briefly: “Let the earth rest in peace!” If you have the opportunity to provide assistance (organizational, financial - any), then it is convenient to complete the words of condolence with this phrase, for example “These days you will surely need help. I would like to be helpful. Count on me!"

I am shocked by this sad news. It's hard to accept it. I share your pain of loss...
My heart is broken by yesterday's news. I worry with you and remember ___ with the warmest words! It's hard to accept the loss ___! Everlasting memory!
The news of the death of ___ is a terrible blow! It hurts even to think that we will never see him/her again. Please accept our condolences with your husband on your loss.
Until now, the news about the death of ___ seems like a ridiculous mistake! It is impossible to comprehend it! Please accept my sincere condolences for your loss!
My condolences! It hurts to even think about it, it's hard to talk about it. I sympathize with your pain! Everlasting memory ___!
It's hard to put into words how ___ and I sympathize with your loss of ___! Golden man, what a few! We will always remember him/her!
“This is an incredible, catastrophic loss. The loss of a real person, an idol, an exemplary family man and a citizen of his country ”(about Ilya Segalovich). .
We empathize with your loss! The news of ___'s death shocked our entire family. We remember and will remember ___ as the most worthy person. Please accept our sincere condolences!
Little consolation, but know that we are with you in grief of loss ___ and sincerely empathize with your entire family! Everlasting memory!
“Words cannot convey all the pain and sadness. Like a bad dream. Eternal peace to your soul, our dear and beloved Jeanne!(Grave and)
An unimaginable loss! We all mourn the loss of ___, but of course it's even harder for you! Sincere condolences, and we will remember all our lives! We want to provide any help that is needed at this moment. Count on us!
It's sad... I respect and remember ___ and sincerely condole with your loss! The least I can do today is to help. At least I have four empty seats in the car.

Condolences on the death of my mother, grandmother

This terrible news shocked me. For me, ___ is a hospitable hostess, a kind woman, but for you ... The loss of your mother ... I sympathize with you so much and cry with you!
We are very ... very upset, beyond words! It is hard when you lose loved ones, but the death of a mother is a grief for which there is no cure. Please accept our sincere condolences for your loss!
___ was a model of delicacy and tact. Her memory will be as endless as her kindness to all of us. The loss of a mother is an incomparable grief. Please accept my deepest condolences!
Woe, nothing compares! And I have no words to ease your pain. But I know she wouldn't want to see you despair. Be strong! Tell me, what could I take on these days?
We are happy that we knew ___. Her kind disposition and generosity surprised us all, and this is how she will be remembered! It is difficult to express in words our grief - it is too great. Let the kindest memories and bright memory of her be at least a small consolation!
The news of ___'s departure came as a shock to us. We can only guess what a blow her departure was for you. At such moments we feel abandoned, but remember that you have friends who loved and appreciated your mother. Count on our help!
Words cannot heal a terrible wound in the heart. But the bright memories of ___, how honestly and with dignity she lived her life, will always be stronger than death. In the bright memory of her, we are forever with you!
They say that grandchildren are loved even more than their children. We felt this love of our grandmother in full. This love will warm us all our lives, and we will pass on part of its warmth to our children and grandchildren ...
Losing loved ones is very hard... And the loss of a mother is the loss of a part of yourself... Mom will always be missed, but may the memory of her and the warmth of the mother always be with you!
Words cannot heal this wound of loss. But the bright memory of ___, who lived her life honestly and with dignity, will be stronger than death. We are with you in eternal memory about her!
Her whole life was spent in countless labors and worries. Such a heartfelt and sincere woman, we will remember her forever!
Without parents, without mother, there is no one between us and the grave. May wisdom and perseverance help you get through these most difficult days. Hold on!
With ___ the model of virtue is gone! But she will remain a guiding light for all of us who remember her, love and honor her.
It is ___ that kind words can be dedicated: “The one whose actions and deeds came from the soul, from the heart.” May the earth rest in peace!
The life she has lived has a name: Virtue. ___ is the source of life, faith and love for loving children and grandchildren. The Kingdom of heaven!
How much we did not tell her during her lifetime!
Please accept my sincere condolences! What a man! ___, as she lived modestly and quietly, she left humbly, as if the candle had gone out.
___ involved us in good deeds, and because of her, we became better. For us, ___ will forever remain a model of mercy and tact. We are happy that we knew her.
Your mother was a smart and bright person ... Many, like me, will feel that the world has become poorer without her.

Condolences on the death of husband, father, grandfather

We are deeply saddened by the news of your father's death. He was a just and strong man, a loyal and sensitive friend. We knew him well and loved him like a brother.
Our family mourns with you. The loss of such a reliable support in life is irreparable. But remember that we will be honored to help you at any moment when you need it.
My condolences, ___! The death of a beloved husband is the loss of yourself. Hold on, these are the hardest days! We grieve with your grief, we are near ...
Today, all who knew ___ mourn with you. This tragedy leaves no one indifferent. I will never forget my friend, and I consider it my duty to ___ to support you on any occasion, if you contact me.
I'm so sorry that ___ and I had disagreements at one time. But I have always appreciated and respected him as a person. I apologize for the moments of pride and offer you my help. Today and always.
Thanks to your statements about his [qualities or good deeds], it seems to me that I also knew him always. Condolences to you on the death of such a loved one and such a soul close to you! Rest in peace…
I sincerely regret the loss of your dad. This is a very sad and sad time for you. But good memories are what will help to survive this loss. Your father lived a long and bright life and achieved success and respect in it. We also join the words of sorrow of friends and memories of ___.
I sincerely condole with you ... What a person, what a scale of personality! He deserves more words than can now be said. In the memories of ___ - he is our teacher of justice and mentor in life. Eternal memory to him!
Without a father, without parents, there is no one between us and the grave. But ___ set an example of courage, resilience and wisdom. And I'm sure he wouldn't want you to grieve like that right now. Be strong! I sincerely sympathize with you.
Your shock from the onset of loneliness is a severe shock. But you have the strength to overcome grief and continue what he did not have time to do. We are nearby, and we will help in everything - contact us! It is our duty to remember ___!
We grieve with you at this difficult moment! ___ — kindest person, silverless, lived for neighbors. We empathize with your loss and are with you in the kindest and brightest memories of your husband.
We are sorry for your loss! We sympathize - the loss is irreparable! Mind, iron will, honesty and justice… — we were lucky to work with such a friend and colleague! How much we would like to ask for forgiveness from him, but it's too late ... Eternal memory to a mighty man!
Mom, we mourn and cry with you! Our sincere gratitude from children and grandchildren and warm memories good father and good grandfather! Our memory of ___ will be eternal!
Blessed are those whose memory will be as bright as ___. We will remember and love him forever. Be strong! ___ It would be easier if he knew that you could handle all this.
My condolences! Recognition, respect, honor, and ... eternal memory!
They say about such broad-minded people: “How much of ours has gone with you! How much of yours is left with us!” We will remember ___ forever and will pray for him!

Condolences on the death of a friend, brother, sister, loved one or loved one

Accept my condolences! It has never been closer and dearer, and probably never will be. But in yours and in our hearts, he will remain young, strong, full of life man. Everlasting memory! Hold on!
It is difficult to find the right words in this difficult moment. I grieve with you! It will be a small consolation that not everyone has experienced such love as yours. But let ___ remain alive in your memory, full of strength and love! Everlasting memory!
There is such wisdom: “It is bad if there is no one to take care of you. It's even worse if you don't have anyone to take care of you." I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be so sad. Let's ask his mom how she can help now.
Condolences to you! Through life hand in hand, but this bitter loss went to you. It is necessary, it is necessary to find the strength in oneself to survive these most difficult minutes and difficult days. He will remain in our memory.
It is very bitter to lose your loved ones and relatives, but it is doubly bitter when young, beautiful, strong leave us. God rest his soul!
I would like to find words to somehow ease your pain, but it's hard to imagine if there are such words on earth at all. Bright and eternal memory!
I grieve with you at this difficult moment. It's scary to even imagine that half of you is gone. But for the sake of children, for the sake of loved ones, you need to survive these mournful days. Invisibly, he will always be there - in the soul and in our eternal memory of this bright man.
Love will not die, and the memory of it will always illuminate our hearts!
… this too shall pass …
For all of us, he will remain an example of love of life. And may his love of life illuminate your emptiness and grief of loss and help you survive the time of farewell. We mourn with you in difficult times and will remember ___ forever!
The past cannot be returned, but the bright memory of this love will remain with you for life. Be strong!
Be strong! With the loss of a brother, you must become a support to your parents twice. God help you get through these difficult times! Blessed memory of a bright man!
There are such mournful words: "A beloved person does not die, but simply ceases to be near." In your memory, in your soul, your love will be eternal! We also remember with a kind word ___.

Condolences to a believing person, a Christian

All of the above is appropriate in expressing support in a difficult moment of loss for both the believer and the secular person. A Christian, Orthodox, can add a ritual phrase to condolences, turn to prayer or quote from the Bible:

God is merciful!
God bless you ___!
For God, everyone is alive!
This man was blameless, just and God-fearing, and moved away from evil!
Lord, rest with the Saints!
Death destroys the body, but saves the soul.
God! Receive the spirit of your servant in peace!
Only in death, the mournful hour, does the soul gain freedom.
God guides the mortal through life before turning him into the light.
The righteous will surely live, says the Lord!
her heart /(his) trusted in the Lord!
Immortal soul, immortal deeds.
May the Lord do mercy and truth with him (her)!
Righteous deeds are not forgotten!
Holy Mother of God, protect him (her) with your cover!
The days of our lives are not numbered by us.
Everything returns to normal.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God!
Peace bright to your ashes!
Kingdom of heaven and eternal rest!
And those who have done good will seek the resurrection of life.
Rest in the Kingdom of Heaven.
And on earth she, like an angel, smiled: what is there, in heaven?

P.S. Once again about active personal participation. For many families, even a small financial contribution to the future will be a valuable help in this difficult moment.

loss loved one

Condolences on the occasion of death will show true empathy for the loss of a person who is experiencing a strong shock and needs moral support. Death is always around us, but we notice it only when it knocks on our house or the house of a really close person. Such a death takes you by surprise and no one is ever ready for the fact that on this day he lost a person dear to him. As Bulgakov once noted in his immortal masterpiece, the problem is not that a person is mortal. The main problem is that he is suddenly mortal.

Condolence texts

I mourn your loss. I know it's a hard blow for you
We offer our sincere condolences to all family and friends
I was told that your brother is dead. I'm sorry, I mourn with you
Gone wonderful person. I send my condolences to you and your entire family at this sad and difficult time.
This tragedy has hurt us all. But of course, it affected you the most. My condolences
I understand how hard it is to lose a loved one. I'm really sorry. Is there anything I can do to help you now?
Sincere condolences to family and friends. Big loss for us. Her memory will be in our hearts. We grieve with our families.
Please accept our sincere condolences. May God reward her in heaven for all the good that she did. She is and will remain in our hearts.
We bring you and your entire family our deep condolences in connection with the tragic death ... We share your grief and turn to you words of support and consolation. We pray for the deceased ... With condolences, ...
Sincere condolences to the family and friends of the untimely deceased .... from our entire family. It is very bitter to lose your loved ones, relatives and friends, and it is doubly bitter if young, beautiful and talented people leave us. God rest his soul.
Everyone who knew him is grieving now, because such a tragedy cannot leave anyone indifferent. I understand how hard it is for you right now. I will never be able to forget him and I assure you that I will support you in every possible way, as soon as you contact me.
We grieve with you for the untimely departed ... Over the years of our friendship, we knew him as .... This is a great loss for everyone, we express our sincere condolences to the parents, all relatives and friends. May the Lord bless his soul.
They say that grandchildren are loved even more than their children. And we fully felt this love of our grandmother (grandfather). Their love will warm us all our lives, and we, in turn, will pass on a particle of this warmth to our grandchildren and great-grandchildren - may the sun of love never fade ...
There is nothing more terrible and painful than the loss of a child. It is impossible to find such words of support to alleviate your pain even a little bit. You can only guess how hard it is for you right now. Please accept our sincere condolences on the death of your dear daughter.
Dear ... Although I didn’t know your father very well personally, but I know how much he meant in your life, because you so often talked about his love of life, sense of humor, wisdom, caring for you ... I think that many people will not grab. I pray to God for you and your family.
There are no words to express how deeply we mourn the death ... . She was a wonderful, kind woman. We can't even imagine how with a strong blow was her care for you. We miss her endlessly and remember how she once ... . She was a model of tact and mercy. We are happy to have her in our lives. You can count on our help at any moment.
I sincerely regret the loss of your dad. I express my sincere sympathy to all of you and I know that this is a very sad and sad time for you. I know from my life how deep the loss is when you realize that he will no longer be in your life. I can tell you, the only thing that can help you get over your loss is your memories. Your father lived a long and fulfilling life and achieved a lot in his life. He will always be remembered as a hardworking, intelligent and loving person. My thoughts and prayers are with you all. I wish you find solace in your family and friends who share your loss. My deepest condolences.

condolences in verse

When the parents leave
Forever fading light in the window.
The father's house is empty and may
I dream much more often.

* * *
Sleep, my angel, calmly and sweetly.
Eternity will take you into its own hands.
You were worthy and steadfast
Survived these hellish torments.

* * *
On this day, full of heartache,
We sympathize with your misfortune
Unfortunately, our life is not eternal,
Every day we are getting closer to the line ...
We condole… Fortress of spirit
We wish you at this moment,
Let the earth be close down,
May the Almighty keep you from harm.

When you left, the light faded
And time suddenly stopped.
And they wanted to live together for a century ...
Why did it all happen?

* * *
Thank you, dear, that you were in the world!
Thank you for loving you.
For all the years that we lived together.
Please don't forget me.

We remember, dear, and mourn,
The wind blows on the heart of the cold.
We love you forever
Nobody can replace you.

* * *
How we loved - only the Gods know.
How we suffered - only we knew.
After all, we went through all the hardships with you,
And we could not step over death ...

What does real empathy look like?

Real support should not resemble standard ritual phrases that are said just to say. These phrases will not play a decisive role for anyone who has just lost the dearest person on the entire planet. How to express condolences in connection with the death? What rules should be followed so that your words of condolence on the occasion of death are not perceived as words without meaning and content?

The first rule - Do not keep your feelings in the shower.

Did you come to the funeral? Come and describe how you feel right now. Do not hold back emotions and feelings. You don't have to be ashamed of how you feel. After all, you didn’t come to this funeral in vain and knew the person. Sometimes it is better to say a few warm words through tears and hug relatives or loved ones of the deceased than to say hundreds of words, playing the role of a great speaker. Warm words are what everyone is waiting for, from whom the sky has taken away a piece of their soul.

The second rule - Condolences on death - is not only words.

Can't find the right words for this situation? Don't talk too much. Sometimes it's better to just hug or touch a grieving person. Shake hands, cry next to you. Show that the person was not left alone in this grief. Show your grief in any way you can. You should not do everything stereotyped and pretend that you are very sorry if it is not so. A person will immediately understand where there will be falsehood, and where there are true feelings and words. A simple handshake is a good chance to express condolences on the death of those who are not very close to the family of the deceased, but came to pay tribute by leading the person on his last journey.

The third rule is to offer the help you can.

Do not limit yourself to words of grief. Not only in word, but in deed! This rule has always been valid. You can offer your help to the family of the deceased. For example, a mother with children could lose her only breadwinner, which means that all these people become victims of a worsening financial condition. You don't have to help with money. If you can help in another way, offer to help. Such a move will only confirm that you are helping not only with words, but also with deeds. Don't turn condolences in your own words into dead sentences. Back them up with action. Even banal assistance in arranging a funeral can be very valuable in the eyes of a grieving person who received a blow below the belt so unexpectedly. Do good deeds and they will be appreciated more than just words.

Fourth rule- Pray for the deceased along with people who have lost a loved one.

Sincere prayer can be seen from afar - this is what all priests and monks say. This is exactly what should be done in the case of condolences. After a few words, the mourner should pray for the deceased along with those who are now experiencing a loss. Prayer calms all believers and will bring at least a little harmony to the wounded heart of the grieving. Prayer distracts even from the greatest grief. Ask God for comfort for those who endure severe torment and do not understand why fate took a loved one away from them. Prayer will not take much time, but it will leave a wonderful impression on those who are now standing in front of you in black clothes and crying out to heaven for help and asking for a logical explanation.

Fifth rule - Remember all the positive things you know about the deceased.

In order to say real words of consolation, you need to remember all the best that connects you with him. Did you play football together as kids? Come and tell me that you can't find a better teammate. Did he save your dog? Did he let you cheat in class or university classes? Remember this too. The mention of original moments from the life of the deceased will only make loved ones smile. If a smile does not appear on the face, it will be in the soul. The dead man could teach you a lot and bring you joy. Share your memories and in a few minutes you will do the impossible - give a spark of joy to those who are now grieving. Had a bad relationship with a person who left this world? Then you should understand that people close to him are not to blame for the small disagreements between you. Forget about all the problems that have happened so far, because when trouble knocks on the door, you should forget about everything.

Rule #6 - Don't talk about things that will get easier in the future.

Don't tell parents who have lost their child that they still have plenty of time to create another little miracle. You should not give hope that time will subsequently heal all wounds, because it is at this moment that it seems to them that life will no longer be the same as always. This is the biggest truth of life - everyone understands that life without a loved one will no longer be the same as before his death. Everyone who is crying at a funeral right now has just lost a little piece of their soul. A woman who has lost her husband should not be told that she is a real goddess and will definitely not be herself in this life. Condolences on the death of mom or dad should also not contain calls for future peace and comfort. Let the person mourn the loss and don't talk about the future. Any words about the future will be superfluous, because no one believes in it now and will not see the picture that you paint.

Seventh rule - Don't say it will pass. Don't say you shouldn't cry and grieve.

Most of the people who say these things have never lost a loved one. Just yesterday, a man kissed in bed and drank dark morning tea with his beloved, and in the evening she may not be in this world. Even yesterday, children quarreled with their parents, and tomorrow they may not be. Yesterday there was a party with friends, and tomorrow one of them may be taken away by the sky. And the understanding that you will never return a loved one is the worst thing that can happen in this life. Therefore, it is not necessary to say that crying will not help here. No need to say that you should not grieve and “destroy” yourself morally so much. No need to play the role of a psychologist and climb into psychological condition man in grief. The first one who says that it is not worth crying only proves that he does not understand the mourner. There is no way to get around serious stress - just let a person cry who cannot understand why he has lost the meaning of his life right now.

Eighth rule - Forget about empty words, among which the most popular phrase is "Everything will be fine"!

Don't make promises you can't keep. Do not talk about optimistic plans for the person, because he will not take it the way you want to present it. A person does not want to hear platitudes and excuses that are so formal that they have become traditional. It is better to help with a deed, and not say traditional phrases from films where the main characters are often buried.

The ninth rule - Do not be ashamed of your feelings!

You came to the funeral, not to the holiday. Therefore, be prepared that you will want to hug the relatives of the deceased, even when you do not know them at all. In the mountains, everyone is the same. Do not be shy of feelings that can cover you with a big wave. Want to hug? Hug! Would you like to shake hands or touch on the shoulder? Do it! Did a tear roll down your cheek? Don't look away. Swipe it off. May you be one of those who came to this funeral for a reason. You came to a loved one who deserved it.

The main conclusion that can be drawn, given these rules, is to bypass the stereotyped words of condolences to the relatives of the deceased and actions that will not bring any benefit. Tactless phrases will not give any benefit. There are words that will only once again cause misunderstandings from the opposite side, not to mention possible aggression, insult or even disappointment. Perhaps you were a close person for the deceased, and now you are not behaving the way his family expects. You must enter into that state of shock in which the person is now. Put yourself in the place of the grieving and then you will understand how to behave correctly. Do not forget that everything you say may not be perceived as it sounds in your mouth. The psychological burden on those who lose a loved one is incredibly large, and this is the decisive moment.

What can you offer a grieving person at a funeral?

Ask how you can help. Perhaps the matter will not be in the material dimension at all, although money in this case is never superfluous. The family of the deceased can trust you to go to the priest or simply arrange for the purchase and transportation of the coffin. A small favor to the family, which is now in a difficult state, will not be superfluous. Indeed, at this moment, none of the relatives of the deceased can adequately assess the situation, and their thoughts in their heads are not at all about the problematic moments of organizing a funeral. Have you heard that even after the murder, the friends of the deceased say that you first need to bury him with honors, and only then look for the killer? The point is that the etiquette of saying condolences is very related to funerals. Do your best to make this funeral go well, because every person deserves to go to the other world with respect for others.

Offer to help in any way. Help will be well received in any case, and even if they refuse you, they will still be pleased. Even ordering memorial cards for invitations to funerals or helping to accommodate guests from distant cities in your home will be a wonderful service. Just do not talk about everything in such a tone, as if you are offering just to just offer. Offer concrete help and get real gratitude.

Be concise, like King Leonidas when he addresses the Spartans!

Condolences should be short. No one should speak for long, as funerals are no place for great speakers. Leave thousands of words to the priest who will bury the deceased. Speak briefly and exactly what you think. At the commemoration, one should also not speak for a long time, since too heavy phrases make one distract and lose their meaning. Do not be afraid to experiment in front of the mirror with a few phrases that you have prepared for yourself. Warm and sincere words are usually very short, as is a declaration of love. Love does not need words, and the deceased is worth only a few sincere offers. Do not forget that fake condolences are easy to feel, because at such a time, relatives and loved ones of the deceased can boast of an increased sense of sincerity and falsehood. Good words can heal the soul and heart of those who are wounded or heartbroken.

What to do for those who had a conflict with the deceased? How to behave and whether condolences of such a person are needed to the relatives and friends of the deceased?

Find the strength in yourself to forgive the one who was taken away by the sky. After all, death is the end point of all grievances. If you have sinned before the deceased, come and pay your respects. Ask for forgiveness in prayer, even if you are not sure you will receive it. Speak sincerely and the relatives of the deceased will accept it with honor. Leave negativity and unnecessary emotions at home. Do not forget that all grievances die with the person. Are you really sorry about your fault, or are you just respecting your competitor in some way? Come and show his loved ones that he was such a respected person that even enemies came to honor his memory. Have a grudge against the deceased? Forgive and let go. Show this to his loved ones and they will rejoice once again that you have forgiven.

Be original!

It's always better to come up with a few good phrases that will be your own to say to the loved ones of the deceased. Coming up with these words, you can remember something from the past of a person. Perhaps you know something about him that others won't. Perhaps you know something that your loved ones do not know. Or perhaps your friend rarely told his parents that he loved them, but in fact he always noted in front of his friends that he the best parents in the world? Why don't you sympathize and remember this? Remember something interesting. Say something really valuable to everyone.

What should be said during condolences?

Say that the person was not just good. Say it's hard to find the words. Let everyone know that the dead man deserves more words than can be said right now. Tell him he was talented. Kind. Give examples to support your words. Set him as an example to many present. Say you loved the dead person. Let everyone know that he will be missed. Say it's a tragedy for you. Tell us about what you are grateful for the deceased and what exactly he did for you. Inform those present that the role of the deceased in your life was great, or vice versa - not so great, but despite this, the world has lost one of the best representatives of humanity. Take breaks. Let yourself choose your words. Let everyone see that you really have a hard time picking them up. Speak the truth!

Will so-called religious condolences always be appropriate?

Religious rhetoric will not always come in handy, since the deceased could be an atheist or profess another faith. You should not use phrases torn from the Bible in all cases, because this may not please many who come. Make sure you can afford it. Only in this case, you can turn your words about the deceased into quotes from the Bible and supplement them with sincere sympathy. Moreover, the deceased could be an agnostic, as well as people grieving for him. In this case, one should also not speak in religious phrases.

Is the person who has lost a loved one really a believer? Then you can correctly select phrases from the church sphere, before that having studied all religious epitaphs more deeply. They can push you to the right path and thoughts. Just do not forget that religiosity should not be too much. In this case, more than ever, a measure is needed.

Despite this, religious themes in condolences will not always be good option and it is not for nothing that most people ignore it. It is better not to use biblical phrases, but to say in your own words what is now in your soul.

Is it worth expressing condolences in the form of poetry?

Just not at funerals. Even if the mourner loves poetry, a funeral is not the time to pay homage to rhyme. Why so categorically? Funeral experts who deal with funerals know thousands of cases where such verses were too out of place, and there is one small reason for this. A verse of condolences on death is always perceived differently by people. 2 people can explain different ways one line of verse. In one phrase, you can see a different meaning depending on the poetry of the one who listens. This is exactly the case when verses of grief and condolences are extremely common and popular, and an obituary in poetic form present the real risk of being misunderstood.

Should I write a condolence SMS?

Never write SMS in any form unless we are talking about a service that gives you the opportunity to send a short message. Can't meet in person? Better call yourself and do not express sympathy in this way. After all, you do not know at what point this message may come, and its too short format makes the words too concise. It conveys facts, not feelings. The person will not feel your voice. His timbre. its emotional connotation. Moreover, messages in such cases are perceived poorly. Was it really difficult to call if you still found a minute to write a message? Perhaps you did not want to talk at all, but wrote a message only to forget about it once and for all and not feel guilty?

May your condolences be sincere! These words are so necessary for those who have lost a loved one. They will be grateful to you!

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