How to cope with stress on your own: advice from psychologists. How to Cope with Stress: Tips and Techniques

Dedicated to a large amount of various scientific works. All mechanisms of its occurrence have been studied in sufficient detail and are quite complex.

They can be tied to the cardiovascular, hormonal and nervous systems. Stressful conditions can reduce immunity and cause many serious pathologies. Accordingly, it is required to know how to cope with stress, calm the nerves and lead a more positive life.

Know the enemy by sight

In fact, it is a functional reaction of the human body to various annoying nuances. As the most common, one should indicate negative emotions, or the ordinary monotony of the surrounding world.

When a stressful state occurs, the body produces adrenaline, which, in its turn, provokes a person to actions unusual for him and increases motivation to change the established order of things.

Everyone needs stress in small amounts. If we take into account psychological perception, then without a stress reaction, life would become unnecessarily bland and would not be filled with a lot of impressions and emotions.

Without the production of adrenaline and the body's transition to stress mode, a person would not have the motivation to continue existence, self-realization and self-improvement.

What to do at the first sign of stress

If we consider stressful conditions from a practical point of view, then it is possible to notice the nuance that every nervous situation in life causes, the most common of which are:

With the manifestation of the above factors, or only some of them, one can speak with a fair degree of confidence about stress or a pre-stress state. The identification of such signs means only that the body has shown the right reaction to the stimulus.

However, you need to take a number of actions and help your own body overcome the state of stress. In order to remove completely or reduce its manifestations to a minimum, you can just get enough sleep. There are some tips that can help improve the quality of sleep and avoid waking up feeling tired:

  1. To fall asleep quickly and sleep well, on the eve of sleep, you need to tire the body. The best option would be to exercise or go for a walk in the fresh air a couple of hours before the expected time of departure for bed.
  2. In order to relax after intense physical activity, it is better to prepare the body for sleep, it is recommended to streamline thoughts. take a bath at a temperature slightly higher than usual and put on some nice music. It is generally accepted that the classic suits everyone.
  3. Melatonin. A particular hormone is able to strengthen sleep and make it healthier. The production occurs with the use of B-group vitamins. It can be a medical vitamin preparation or dishes with rice, barley, wheat. Sunflower seeds and dried apricots are also suitable.

Sudden nervous outburst

In order to get rid of sudden stress caused by an unforeseen event, you can go in several ways.

A sufficient number of techniques, methods and means to overcome stress have been developed, from which each person can choose something suitable.

You can cope with stress with the help of numerous techniques, you can go to an appointment with a psychologist and he will select the right one, or you can choose on your own:

There are also many methods for relieving stress, the main ones are:

  • let go of emotions, preferably in a secluded place;
  • rotation of the head, hands, rubbing fingers;
  • a smile removes the display of stress on the face, and after the visible, internal tension also goes away.

Remedies for stress relief are extensive, common are:

  • tea drinking - most teas have a calming effect;
  • a cup of coffee - if drinking coffee is a familiar ritual, then this can calm you down quite a lot and return the normal train of thought;
  • eat a sweet or an energetically valuable product.

Exercises to relieve nervous shock

In addition to the generally accepted methods, there are some physical exercises and activities designed specifically to relieve stress:

  • stretching;
  • static exercises;
  • breathing exercises;
  • dancing;
  • fencing;
  • martial arts.

If the nerves are constantly naughty

To relieve stress of a chronic type, one-time methods and methods intended for sudden situations are not enough. A more detailed approach is required:

  • calm down and take a sober look at the situation;
  • allow yourself something nice, as a bonus;
  • pay attention to nutrition and increase the amount of carbohydrates;
  • evaluate what is happening from the point of view of rationalism;
  • let go of emotions;
  • loosen control over your own life and not demand too much from yourself;
  • discuss the problem with someone close or take advantage of the "accidental fellow traveler" effect.

How to relieve stress after work

A busy work process and the need to follow a strict schedule cannot go unnoticed and cause stress. To relieve tension and stress after a hard day and avoid its further progress, you must:

  • calming and relaxing, it is possible to use meditation techniques;
  • water is suitable to relieve stress - go to the pool for swimming or water aerobics, sauna, bath;
  • if there is a quiet park or forest nearby, an evening walk and unity with nature will help curb stress;
  • watching worthy films at home or in the cinema;
  • bath with essential oils.

Emergency help in a stressful situation

There are moments in life when a person simply does not have time for himself, but requires complete concentration and attention to something. Then come in handy quick ways to relieve or reduce stress:

  • if stress has caught up during any important meeting, fix your attention on your own breathing and keep track of it;
  • in the process of a difficult and serious conversation on the phone, try not to stand still, this will help burn excess energy;
  • being at the workplace, it is recommended to put a photo of loved ones in a frame, with special stress, looking at it, a good mood quickly returns;
  • try to eat sweets;
  • while working at the computer, you can perform squats with a 10-minute interval.

A huge variety of standard methods can not only not solve the problem of stress, but even exacerbate it. To avoid this, you can try to calm your nerves and relieve internal tension and stress effectively, non-standard and pleasant:

Self-relief of stress after nervous shocks

Sometimes life turns not in the best direction, and extremely unpleasant events occur - divorce, separation or death of loved ones, pets, dismissal from work or irreparable loss of personal property.

With such events, you can not lock yourself in and go with the flow. It is necessary to actively engage in the fight against apathy and stress:

Training to relieve emotional tension and stress:

How to change your overall approach to life

Dealing with stress after the onset of its symptoms is a worthwhile endeavor. But, preventing a disease is easier than curing it. To avoid in everyday life, you need to change the integrated approach to life completely. For this you need:
conduct a full analysis of the events.

  • the habit of planning the day;
  • abandon the position of "victim";
  • do not demand too much from yourself and others;
  • pick a hobby.

In any case, everyone wants to get rid of stress. The main thing in this business is the realization that everyone is the blacksmith of his own happiness.

Stress is a ubiquitous phenomenon in today's world. In the UK, one study found that one in five people in that country experience stress. Most often, the emotional stress of people is associated with work or problems in relationships with other people. During stress, the body begins to work at its maximum. The release of hormones into the bloodstream leads to increased breathing and heartbeat. The level of sugar in the blood during stress rises sharply, the pressure rises. A similar response of the body helps to resist emotional overstrain. When the factors that cause stress are removed or disappear, the body easily returns to normal.

But often a source of stress constantly acts on a person and causes emotional tension and anxiety. In this case, we are talking about chronic stress that affects the health of all body systems. To maintain normal physical and mental health, steps must be taken to combat stress. Otherwise, its harmful effects on the body cannot be avoided.

Effects of stress on humans:

  • Difficulties with
  • Depletion of emotional forces
  • depressive states
  • Deterioration in health
  • Impaired communication with other people

As strange as it sounds, stress can be beneficial. It all depends on our attitude towards it and the ability to control it. One and the same situation in one person can cause severe stress, and the other by the evening will not even remember it. It's all about temperament and health. Sensitivity to stress increases with the increase in the number of stressful situations transferred in life. How can you tell if you are stressed? If your life goes on in a busy schedule and you can’t relax, and you can’t respond correctly to unforeseen situations, then you have an emotional overstrain.

Often, ineffective methods are used to relieve stress:

  • Alcohol, drugs
  • Inappropriate food intake
  • Hours of watching TV or sitting at the computer
  • Refusal to eat

The stress from the above methods will not only not disappear, but, on the contrary, will increase significantly. But how then to deal with stress? Let's look at four factors that cause stress, and how to deal with stress in these cases.

Stress factors:

  • Busy daily routine
  • or other instability
  • Relationship problems with other people
  • Emotional trauma

How to deal with constant anxiety

In today's world, it is impossible to be absolutely immune from problems. They often take us by surprise and cause a storm of negative emotions. The instability of life often makes you feel constant anxiety, which subsequently develops into emotional tension or stress. The following tips can help you in this situation:

  1. Tell a close friend about your concerns. The emotional support of loved ones is invaluable in dealing with stress.
  2. Try not to think about the solution to the problem or the future in a negative light. Such an approach only increases stress and depletes mental strength.

The fast pace of life is one possible source of stress. It is especially intensified if you have the responsibility to provide for your family, take care of small children and elderly parents. Try these 2 stress relief tips:

  1. Get your priorities right. Entrust minor matters to other family members or postpone for another time.
  2. Be sure to set aside time for rest to relax and replenish emotional strength.

How to avoid conflict stress

Often stress arises from misunderstandings, conflicts with people at work or. The following tips are very effective in interpersonal conflicts:

  1. In a conflict situation, try to remain calm and do not aggravate it with thoughtlessly spoken words.
  2. Solve any disagreements in private, showing respect for the other side of the conflict.
  3. Put yourself in the place of your abuser and look at the conflict through his eyes. This will help to better understand his position and feelings, and possibly the reason for his behavior. Such reflection will calm anger and help find ways to resolve the conflict.
  4. Try not to hold a grudge, but rather forgive. This will save you from health problems and relieve emotional stress. Those who are angry or constantly offended risk tachycardia and blood pressure jumps.

Emotional turmoil and PTSD (VIDEO "Prevention and management of stress")

Emotional trauma following the death of loved ones, natural disasters, car crashes, or other accidents can trigger PTSD. People who have experienced an emotional shock often cannot get rid of pictures of tragic events that constantly pop up in their memory. Post-traumatic stress can manifest itself in the following symptoms:

  • Sleep problems (insomnia, restless sleep, nightmares).
  • The emergence of emotions experienced in a tragic situation.
  • Fear of noise and loud sounds.
  • At the slightest association with the experienced extreme situation, emotional stress arises.
  • Inability to concentrate and soberly assess the situation.
  • Emotional exhaustion and apathy.
  • Sweating, heart palpitations, breathing problems.
  • Feeling the unreality of the events taking place around and alienation from them.
  • Lack of joy from everything that previously caused it.
  • Coldness in
  • Anxiety and feelings of insecurity.

One woman in a short period of time suffered the death of 2 children, her husband and mother. Before these tragic events, she suffered from a terrorist attack at the airport. Years later, she lost her second husband and her house burned down. The woman was so emotionally traumatized that she wanted to take her own life.

What helped her to endure all this and find the strength to live on? The support of good friends who consoled her. Also, the woman tried to do everything in her power to help others. This attitude gave her strength and incentive to fight PTS. It may be useful for PTS to consult a qualified specialist. With emotional trauma, it will help to find an effective way of treatment to get out of PTS.

Dealing with stress is hard work. It starts with a change in lifestyle. Above all, try to eat healthy, get enough sleep, and exercise regularly. Minimize your alcohol and caffeine intake. Don't forget to take breaks while you work.

Hobby, playing a musical instrument. Learn to respond differently to circumstances and don't let them overwhelm you. With effort, you can get rid of stress!

There is a ton of information out there on this topic, but I think Leo Babauta, the author of the self-improvement blog Zen Habits, has a very good way to deal with stress.

Stress is one of the most significant problems of modern society. Anxiety, nervous work, chaos at home, unpaid bills, bad habits (unhealthy diet, alcohol, smoking) - all this creates just a huge amount of stress in our lives. If your life is full of stress, there are simple ways to get rid of it, or at least significantly reduce its impact.

I’ll note right away that if you live in a city, in an ordinary and familiar society, you may not be able to completely protect yourself from stressful situations - there is too much of everything around. Of course, in a sense, it is also useless to completely get rid of stress, because the importance of stress in our life is also important, it is one of the natural reactions of the body, stimulating and awakening its internal potential. Stress becomes a problem when it crosses all reasonable limits, causing outright harm to both the physical and mental health of a person.

The essence of the process of overcoming stress is to return to "nature", in inner and outer harmony, as much as possible. This includes the gradual getting rid of bad habits, because they, of course, have nothing to do with a natural and healthy life.

Why do we talk about health when it comes to stress? Because stress and health are closely related. Severe stress can destroy health; Improving and strengthening your health can increase your ability to deal with stress. In general, in a healthy body - a healthy mind - there is no place for stress.

So, how to get rid of bad habits and, thereby, become less prone to stress? The secret is simple: do the right thing and gradually. Aspiration also protects from stress.

Below you will find a list of 10 such things.

Ways to deal with stress

1. For one approach - one thing. This is the easiest way to start reducing the amount of stress in your life. Just start doing it today, right now. Focus on working on just one bad habit, or start by organizing your living space. For example, remove everything superfluous from the desktop. Leave only what you need to work. Need to write a report? Do just that and nothing more. Do not talk on the phone, do not check email, social networks, etc. If you are going to parse the mail, then do nothing else. Of course, this is not easy, especially at first. I myself had this habit: to do something else along the way. But, as practice shows, it only gets worse, because focus on work, time is lost, and efficiency also drops. In the end - only a loss, no matter how you look at it.

2. Simplify your schedule. A busy work schedule is one of the main causes of stress. Just remove some of the things from your life, leaving only the necessary. everything unimportant or even unimportant. Of course, no one forces you to do this recklessly - get rid of unnecessary things gradually, it’s unlikely to work right away anyway. Fill your schedule with only important things, leaving free time in it as well.

3. Get moving. Movement is life, and this phrase exists for a reason. A simple example: if you sit all the time, you will get sick. Why? Because our body is a dynamic system that requires movement to function optimally. Virtually all tissues in the body are muscles in one form or another that need to contract in order to maintain circulation and metabolism. By the way, it is best to move in nature or as close to it as possible.

4. Try to get one healthy habit every month. This is not difficult when you are not given a condition urgently in a month; you just gradually develop one thing useful. Just one thing, a little, slowly, so that your mind does not resist drastic changes, and you do not feel infringed or put in a rigid framework. For example, instead of something not very healthy, start eating some fruit every day. Or start taking walks in the fresh air in the evenings, for example, before going to bed. Or you can start doing some exercises.

5. Relax. Is there something you love to do that calms you down? By the way, often it is physical activity that brings good relaxation, because. relieves unnatural muscle and nervous tension received during the working day. Other options are taking a bath, reading, taking a nap, etc. Some people find it soothing to do housework. Walking in nature is great for me, for example; you can still meditate or. Find something that will relieve your nerves and muscles, let your body and mind relax.

6. Simplify your finances. If we have a lot of all sorts of bills and expenses, then the financial side can bring a lot of headaches. We need to find a way to simplify all financial control. For example, automate bill payments, savings deposits, regular expenses, so as not to give them your energy. Another option is to shop less, or rather, less often. So you will waste less energy on what is not really important in life. Let these things go in the background.

7. Have fun! Every day, find at least a few minutes to laugh, have a good time, tune in to positive thoughts. Play with the kids, for example, or watch a fun movie with the whole family. You can play something (especially outdoors, sports games, for example, again with the whole family or with friends; board or computer games are also suitable, but do not get carried away with computer games too much, because they also draw energy). The main idea is to have fun.

8. Do something creative. Creative activity has amazing potential in terms of coping with stress. This is possible because by acting creatively, we release our inner potential, thereby destroying negative things like stress. Just do something that you enjoy. By the way, activities such as modeling or crafts are great for relaxing.

9. Get rid of unnecessary things. According to the ancient sciences of organizing space, such as Vastu and Feng Shui, an excessive pile of things leads to confusion in thoughts. If you are in a spacious, comfortable and clean room, your thoughts also come in order. This connection is quite observable in life. But don't make it a "spring cleaning" - let getting rid of the trash also become part of the fun or even creative activity.

10. Get up early. Interesting, but I've seen from my own experience that it works. When you get up early in the morning, somehow, your view of the world becomes more positive. Perhaps this is due to what in the Vedic literature is called the gunas or qualities of nature (goodness, passion and ignorance or darkness). Goodness acts in the morning, passion in the afternoon, and ignorance in the evening and at night. Therefore, it is believed that in the morning you need to do what elevates thoughts and consciousness, during the day what contributes to material prosperity, and in the evening - just relax (sleep at night, respectively :)).

In addition, there is another interesting point: when you get up earlier than usual, your day is subjectively perceived as “longer”, and it turns out to have time to do more things. Also, when you do all the most important things in the morning, they not only turn out faster and better, but the rest of the day goes more positively, because. you are not burdened by the burden of responsibility and heaviness from doing important things.

It's not a question of whether we are "larks" or "owls". Practice shows that the principle “early in the morning” applies to everyone, just because of various factors, we ourselves have developed this or that way of life. But it's worth developing a new habit, and you can see for yourself how much better, healthier and more efficient it is to get up early and do the most important things first. This will greatly reduce the amount of stress in your life.

Well, now I hope you know what to do with stress, or rather, how to deal with stress most effectively, and how to prevent its occurrence.


In modern society, every second person is exposed to stress, especially when it comes to the population of large cities. Psychologists and psychotherapists insist that each person must train sufficient stress resistance in himself, otherwise negative consequences are inevitable. Leading experts are ready to share methods and techniques on how to cope with stress at work.

Prolonged stress disrupts not only the psycho-emotional background, but also the functioning of important systems and organs. Against the background of an oppressed and depressed state, working capacity, intellectual and physical abilities decrease, the quality of sleep suffers, and much more. At the same time, few people know that anyone can learn to cope with stress on their own if they wish and follow the recommendations of specialists.

10 popular ways to deal with stress

Water

If a person needs an ambulance from stress before an important event, for example, before an exam or a job interview, plain water can be a simple and affordable tool. Psychologists note that it is water that can have a positive effect on the emotional state, it is only important to focus on your own feelings and feelings.

It is enough just to turn on the water or go to a living source, and then listen to the murmur of water. The flow of a river, a stream has the same effect, and in rainy weather, you can simply watch the rain in complete silence, listening to the sounds of nature. Another great tool for dealing with stress is watching a fountain, taking a shower or a bath.

Expert opinion

Victor Brenz

Psychologist and self-development expert

People with a weak psyche who are regularly exposed to severe stress and depression can sign up for a pool, as swimming is great for calming and distracting from negative thoughts.

Creation

A great way to eliminate any feelings is a new hobby, namely creativity, which helps to release any emotions and feelings outward. In addition, creativity allows self-expression and self-realization, which also eliminates negative thoughts and worries, increasing self-esteem.

At the same time, you need to understand that all people have different talents and abilities, someone is closer to music, someone is drawing, reading or writing poetry. Art therapy is considered as one of the methods of dealing with stress and depression.

Nature

In order to independently cope with stress and anxiety, as well as to prevent depression in time, each person must periodically be alone with himself and nature.

Many meditation techniques teach intuitive connection with nature, as communication with nature has a positive effect on the psycho-emotional background, helping to get rid of tension. It can be a walk in the woods, hiking, rock climbing, a picnic or a hike.

Animals

Pets have always been considered the best antidepressants, as they cause only positive emotions, joy, and also help to distract from worldly troubles and problems. In some cases, with the help of pets, people cope with fears, depression, panic attacks, etc.

Do you love animals?

YesNo

The best healers in such situations are horses, there is even a separate method of hippotherapy, as well as dolphins, dogs, cats. Contact with them revives the emotions of love, awe and care.

Massage

To cope with stress and anxiety, regardless of the reasons, whether it is a new job or lack of it, the relaxing massage technique will help. To do this, you need to determine the desired areas on the body, the impact on which will lead to relaxation and calm. Psychologists advise massaging the area of ​​the head and face, neck and shoulders, arms and shoulder blades. During times of stress, these areas tend to be in a "muscle knot" state.

It is better to massage gently with the use of massage oil, regular procedures will not only eliminate the effects of stress, but also strengthen the immune system. In addition, periodic courses of professional massage will make a person energetic, cheerful and active. A separate technique for dealing with stress and anxiety is also considered - tactile therapy.

Sport

Stress is often accompanied by the production of harmful hormones in the body, which can be neutralized with the help of sports. For starters, you can just regularly take walks in the fresh air for an hour and a half, you can gradually move on to running, cycling or other active sports. Sport tempers character and disciplines, and also gives self-confidence.

You can train 1-2 times a week, visiting the gym or at home. Psychologists also recommend visiting the pool, as swimming perfectly relaxes and strengthens the immune system. Men should try their hand at martial arts, women are suitable for dancing, fitness, yoga. Also, hobbies such as darts, skating or roller skating, tennis, basketball or football can color the everyday life with positive emotions.

Yoga

Ways to cope with stress and depression necessarily include yoga, as this sport and gymnastics help not only to stretch muscles and become flexible, but also to concentrate on emotions and feelings.

As practice has shown, yoga training helps to recover even from prolonged and chronic depression, it is enough just to attend classes without skipping. Breathing exercises will help to strengthen the effectiveness of therapy, control over breathing establishes self-control over emotions and feelings.

Light

Few people know that you can get rid of stress, anxiety and depression, sleep disorders with the help of light. The technique does not imply any difficulties, a person just needs to spend as much of his time as possible in a well-lit room or on the street.

In the house, it is important to establish a bright, but moderate enough light to get rid of stress, but not disturb vision. Today, experts offer special lamps designed for such therapy, the effectiveness of which is higher than antidepressant treatment.

Music

If you have to deal with stress and anxiety on your own at home, music will be the best assistant. Music, like human emotions, carries certain vibrations, and vibrations from music are ways to shift the emotional course for the better. Since stress blocks the energies flowing in the body, rhythmic music helps to wake them up.

In addition, voices can affect the emotional background, so experts advise listening to music with good vocals. And you can sing along yourself, because during singing, breathing is regulated, which is usually quickened and knocked down during stress. As a result of listening to music and the penis, blood circulation improves, breathing evens out, and the functioning of many systems and organs improves.

Products

Food is another way to deal with stress, as experts have identified several foods that are not inferior in properties to antidepressant drugs. Many people have probably noticed that during anxiety, fear and excitement, they especially want chocolate, honey, or something else sweet. The fact is that carbohydrates provoke the production of the hormone of joy serotonin, thanks to which you can calm down and relax.

Experts note that any products of red, orange and yellow color, that is, carrots, tomatoes, persimmons, bananas, apples, oranges, pumpkin, apricots, etc., can become antidepressants. You can also increase energy resource and tone with the help of products containing caffeine, but in measured portions. Dark chocolate is a great mood booster that many women enjoy.

Why is it better to manage stress yourself?

To understand the feasibility of self-reliance on stress, psychologists focus on an important point. The fact is that as you train and apply the above methods, a person not only suppresses stress, but also instills useful habits in himself, namely self-control over his emotions and condition, self-confidence and satisfaction with life.

In the future, this will come in handy in any situation, whether it be training, work environment or family relationships. In addition, as you master these techniques, a person will be able to further suppress stress in a matter of seconds in any unfavorable and uncomfortable environment, thereby preventing negative consequences. If independent efforts have not brought results, it is important to seek qualified help.

Conclusion

You can cope with stress quickly with the help of improvised means or simple techniques, or you can develop certain skills and abilities in yourself, that is, self-control and endurance. First of all, a person needs to find an irritant that causes a stress reaction in the body, eliminate it, and then reconfigure the emotional state in a positive direction. Today, psychologists and psychotherapists practice and teach patients most often 10 techniques that were described above.

A few years ago, my life was a chaotic flow of affairs, worries and events.

After my divorce, I worked two jobs (full-time each), finished my studies at a nutrition school, wrote a diploma, blogged, hosted webinars, raised two fairly young children (now they are 4 and 9 years old), ran around on dates and met friends almost every day. (Have you got a flash in your eyes yet?)

At the same time, I managed to read a bunch of educational literature, go to the gym and travel several times a year. From the outside - not a life, but a dream. But answering questions in an interview about how I manage to do everything, I wanted to shout: “Yes, I don’t have time!”

Don't believe happy photos on Instagram. You will never know the truth about how these successful people live and feel. I really LIKE to have time for everything. Especially when compared with those who dream a lot of things, but do not start to act in any way. But a lump of tension grew inside - because I wanted to do even more, I was always dissatisfied with the result. And in general, as I understand now, I just ran away from myself.

I overloaded myself with work and communication. It was not at all necessary for me to have two jobs - one Danish salary was enough for me and my children to live. But I have ambitions, I want to live only at the expense of dietetics! Needing admiration and attention after a painful divorce, I ran non-stop dates. I thought it boosted my self-esteem. But in fact, I wasted my energy and time on strangers.

I rushed through life at a frantic pace. Until the dizziness started. At first they did not appear every day or even every week. I sinned on a lack of iron, but blood tests showed the norm, and dizziness, meanwhile, became more frequent. By March of this year, they had become so strong that I doubted whether I had the right to drive. It got scary...

After analyzing my condition, I realized that I was dealing with impending stress (dizziness, poor sleep, fatigue even after ten hours of sleep, inability to concentrate, poor memory, palpitations, excessive sweating during sleep, mood swings, a gloomy outlook on life ...) I had almost all the signs - either immediately or one after another.

My favorite motto is: “The only way to stay in place is to run very fast. To get somewhere, you have to move at least twice as fast” was questioned. I started to do the opposite: reduce stress and the number of cases.

For starters, for once, I decided to turn to a psychologist. It didn't take long to find him. After the divorce, I already resorted to the help of a specialist in this profile and was very pleased with the result.

We are always greedy for psychologists, nutritionists, a personal trainer... (Growing up nails every month is not a pity for money, but for some reason a toad presses on peace of mind and health...) And very much in vain! Most of my clients know everything about proper nutrition, but they do not know the main thing: how to implement it into their life.

While a specialist helps you understand where to go, what mistakes you make, and what changes and techniques you need. Our usual stingy approach: “I'm reading a lot of smart articles from the Self-Help series now and kaaak start ...” does not work.

I decided not to be greedy and spent money. Not for a new wardrobe and bath oil, as the gloss advises, but for a psychologist. I have no time! Life is to be lived. Therefore, there was no time to delve into the Internet. And you know what? I have not regretted a single penny spent. In addition, I saved a lot of time and nerves for myself and the people around me and became definitely wiser.

Of course, you can deal with stress on your own. The specialist will only direct you; in any case, you will have to fulfill the prescribed yourself. But with the support of experienced and knowledgeable people, this path is much easier. After removing the most acute symptoms, I began to slowly deal with my stress.

1. I removed, as far as possible, situations that provoke stress.

Stress is an overload both in the number of cases and in the number of negative emotions. Do you really need to go to the gym five times a week? Or can you limit yourself to two workouts, but increase the number of walks? If your job annoys you, maybe it's time to change it? I myself have drastically reduced the number of visits to social networks. It just seems like a minute here, two there. During the day, there are a huge number of HOURS spent in front of the screen without a goal. In addition, I agreed with my boss to reduce my working hours per week to free up more time for blogging and dieting.

2. I wrote a list of things and activities that bring me pleasure.

This list must contain at least 20 items. Recorded? Now put them all on the calendar. AND DO IT! You do not forget about the meeting with the authorities, so do not forget about the meeting with yourself. Scheduled an hour to read - read. My personal list included: massage, cooking, reading, going to a cafe, walking with my daughter, fooling around with my son (this can also be included in the plan to ensure that time is allocated for this). Recently, a neighbor asked me why it takes me so long to put my kids to bed. I explained to her that I first read and lie with one until he falls asleep, and then I do the same with the other. And she told me: “You don’t have to do this at all.” And I understand that I don't have to. But I CONSCIOUSLY set aside almost an hour of my time every night for this because I enjoy it. Such an investment in today's happiness and in future relationships with children.

3. I put things in order. Both at home and in the diary.

Nothing gets on your nerves like scattered things and unfinished business. This is also a stressor, especially if you, like me, suffer from perfectionism. And even better - get rid of unnecessary things. You just wonder how many unidentified and forgotten objects are in our house. Now I go EVERY week to donate unnecessary things and I keep thinking, when will I finally finish decluttering? By the way, the best book on this topic, in my opinion, is "Magical Cleaning" by Marie Kondo.

4. I have forgiven those who haunt me.

Until you truly forgive these people, they will keep coming back into your life, over and over again, causing stress. My ex-husband, with his talent to create a problem from scratch, regularly spoiled my mood. Day after day! It seemed that I couldn’t get away from this, because we have children in common. But - a miracle! - after a thorough forgiveness with the help of various techniques, I managed to significantly reduce the number of our conflicts. Here best technique for forgiveness with whom I worked. It was designed by Alexander Sviyash. Checked. Works.

5. I started practicing meditation and breathing exercises.

Breathing helps calm the nervous system, thereby stabilizing the production of stress hormones. Only by inhaling deeply can you let your body know that the “tiger” (stress factor) has already gone, and you can relax. I started to practice Devi Intoyo meditation on harmonization of soul and body. In addition, I began to listen at night peace mantra. All this takes only 10-15 minutes, but the effect is worth it.

6. I declared war on perfectionism.

Learn to share what is important, what can wait, what you can not do at all, and what to delegate to others. For example, I stopped ironing bed linen and towels. The windows in the house are now washed by a person hired for this. A moderate mess in the house a couple of times a week is not the biggest problem. First the IMPORTANT things, and then the secondary ones.

7. I fixed the energy leaks.

I have minimized communication with people who only do what they criticize and do not bring joy, with eternally whining acquaintances. This turned out to be much more difficult than I thought. I was relieved to say goodbye to uninteresting books. Previously, I considered myself obliged to immediately answer all the questions, which, by virtue of my profession, I receive a lot. Now I have introduced a rule - to check messages and mail at certain hours. It is a little unusual to observe it, but the further, the easier! Now I save just a lot of time. Plus, I plan entertainment in a very dosed way and do not rush, as before, to make friends with all the people I like. Fortunately, I already have many invaluable friends and colleagues in the shop.

8. I learned to say "no" and "I'll think about it."

If you are asked for the third time if you would like to become a member of the parent committee in kindergarten, this is not a reason to agree. You have your own schedule, and let others sit on the committee. It has absolutely nothing to do with loving your children. If mom falls down with stress, they will definitely miss you here. I explained to other moms and caregivers that I can’t become an active parent in any way. And in the office, I don’t grab on to assignments that are not related to my direct duties, as I did before.

9. I plan three important things for the day, for the month, for the quarter, for the year and for the five-year period.

Only three. This helps to keep the focus, the desire to grab onto everything at once disappears. The feeling of eternal time pressure disappears. Just three things - everyone can do it. Now every morning I make a list of three important things and three small things that do not take much time, but do not tolerate delay. Very comfortably! And most importantly - there is a feeling that now I actually have time for everything.

WARNING: The three important things mean more than just work. This list should also include things from the list of pleasures. Walking in the woods is no less important than writing a report. For example, I am now planning the release of articles on the blog, and the training plan is scheduled as much as a month in advance. Of course, plans can change. There is no crime in this. But life is much easier when everything is planned.

10. I make time for myself.

An hour a day, a day a week, a week a year... The more, the better. This is the time when I, WITH A CLEAR CONSCIENCE, can only do what I want right now. Lying aimlessly on the couch with stupid gloss, “stupidly” watching the sunset, fooling around with children, walking around in pajamas all day (a bonus of bachelor life :)) ... These activities can vary. But I make sure to set aside one day a week when I'm not working. Usually it's Saturday. On this day, I do everything without plans and according to my mood. If the sun is outside, I go for a walk. If it rains, I can lie down with a book, have breakfast slowly and generally allow myself to be lazy.

The following books helped me better understand my condition and overcome stress:

  1. Vadim Zeland“Reality Transurfing” is about how to relax, make a wish and calmly go to it, like going to a newsstand for a newspaper. The book helped me understand that the path to success is not only and not always hard work. Also, everything is possible in this life!
  2. Joe Dispenza “The Power of the Subconscious, or How to Change Your Life in 4 Weeks” - the author, of course, turned down about four weeks. But! The book scientifically substantiates the theory that thoughts are material, and, importantly, teaches how to dream. I will write about this some other time - the realization of dreams up to the details of the interior (!) Is very impressive!
  3. Andrew Matthews "Live easy, be happy" - simple truths in understandable language. Maybe you already know all this, but still. It will be useful to remind yourself of this again.